The Weekend 5 (Sunday, November 1st 2020)

 Welcome to November. It feels weird this year. Nothing feels like normal. I am unsure how I will feel after the year is over. Cause we still have 3 major holidays and 2 more birthdays. And seeing as we are in November I am again not doing NaNoWriMo. I have been doing that lovely write a book in a month since 2008. Then 2019 happened when I lost Rainbow I lost my writing spirit and I couldn't do it. Then this year happened and well I am just not doing it again this year. However my *goal* is to either do it again next year or begin to edit one of my many past books! Shall see. Nice *GOALS*. I do love this month as I try to be thankful for every day of the month. So I shall try to do it again even if its on twitter. Lets do this 2 more months left this year. 

1. Church was awesome last week. I love church. I love it so much! I was prayed over again by my pastor. I took pictures with my friends. A wonderful message. Just great stuff. And yes as we are in this month coming soon is women's studies again. 10 weeks of fun begins on the 19th yes twice a week church will be back :)) 

2. Work is so blah! I worked Sunday & Monday and then I called out Wednesday due to my second part of my dental procedure ugh. I am down to less than 5 PTO which means I cant get paid to call out and will gain a point. It will take me months to get back up to a shift. I hope by time that happens I wont even be working here in anymore. Please oh please. And Saturday being Halloween was beyond busy. UGH. So insane. I worked two mornings in a row which was nice for me more sleep Saturday but still tired :/

3. I did my last 2 therapies for my neck. And now we wait. November 11th is coming in two weeks. So I have 2 weeks and I need to pray and figure out if I should get a shot in my neck for my pain. I truly thought after all my stuff I would be much closer to better. I thought God was using all this to heal me. Not saying He didnt. But I am still hurt and now unsure how well I will be till I am better and not doing stuff. Ugh. So much stress.

4. Wednesday I got my root canal done. It took about an hour. Ugh the pain. And not till the 10th to get my final on. I would say its healing but it still hurts. Thank God the area is not swollen that took like 3 days to go down. I also made an appointment by phone for this Thursday to discuss results of my shoulder MRI which I am pretty sure I wont know before then. This is all in Gods hands.

5. GYM did it twice wow!! Monday our usual plus Friday. Yeah fun. I love the gym. Also at home I did walks twice Tuesday & Thursday. I love my little walks part walks of prayer part quiet times sometimes other stuff. All good. I still miss Rainbow dont get me wrong but better each day with Jesus amen.

Thats all for now. This week wont be as crazy but it will be. With my paper being discussed on Thursday and my MRI thing and doing the ZOO on my day off this will be a not super busy but still steady week indeed. Bring on November here we go. Have a great week. God bless you!!

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, October 25th 2020)

Welcome to the last one of these for this month. I know I know. Here comes the holidays. A piece of me is relieved something normal. But the way things are going I am unsure how normal its gonna be. But heres to hoping. God is in control and is on the throne. It will be okay!

1. Work is blah. I had to call out for another dental issue so I didnt work as much. I worked Sunday, Monday, and Saturday. But didnt get scheduled Wednesday and called out on Friday. Yup. I did my last 2 acupuncture sessions. Now I am unsure if I am coming back shall know more after my doctor visit on the 11th. I had 1 therapy not 2. I have 2 more therapies left then those too will be gone. Unsure where we go from here since I'm not well yet. But will I ever be well enough to not get help? God healing me and using these means is all I got for now just trusting in Him.

2. Extra fun this week. First I had my MRI for my shoulder on Tuesday. I am still waiting for results. The doctor has them but has not yet looked at them so they not online. Also on Friday I had to go back to the dentist. My mom for now footed my bill so I will be paying her back for a long long long time. My other tooth that needed a root canal began to bug me way more than I was comfortable with. And I go back next week so I will have to do that on Wednesday fun. But grateful that I got it done and mom was willing to help me out. Idk what I would have done had she not...

3. GYM just once this week. It all good! Also workout at home just twice. Did just one walk. I wanted 2 but things happened so it was okay. 

4. Church was beautiful last week. We are about a month from more studies womens begins November 19th. I cant wait for twice a week it will be great. Yeah. Anyways. I love church. I love my pastor. I love how he prays for me even if I dont ask he just knows. And prays and cares for me so much. 

5. Wednesday was my favorite day. I went to my good friend's house. It was so awesome. I finally got to see her place and her backyard. Got a tour. Got to pain rocks and chat. It was a nice day off. I would love to go back and paint more rocks. I'm not that creative but I do like doing art stuff now and then sometimes. Why not. So thank you friend it was great. I love my friend so much :)

Thats all for now. This week is busy. And unsure. Its what it is. Have a great week everyone!! God bless you always. :) 

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, October 18th 2020)

Welcome. Today sadly marks 5 years since my sisters cat Maggie left us. I still miss that silly orange cat and it still makes me sad how fast she went and how unsure we will always be what took her!! I'm glad she has a friend in Rainbow and they are up there playing with Princess too. I hope that all our pets are together when we cross to heaven. I wanna see them all one by one. Love you Maggie Pie!

1. My beautiful Rainbow. It has been 1 years since you left me for the other side of here. The bridge wherever you are waiting for me. You left me on the 12th. I had a horrible day. I cried so much my eyes hurt. Begged Jesus to take my grief it was overwhelming me so badly. I wanted to die. I've spent a year not taking care of my diabetes eating whatever I need to get healthy again. Clearly I wont die from that or a broken heart. I am not there yet dear Rainbow. But I will join you soon I am unsure when but soon. So after I cried my eyes out and worshipped God with all my might. I woke up feeling different the next day. I have to believe that Jesus finally took that grief burden off me. My heart is still broken but I have to believe its getting healed now closer each day. I wont ever stop missing my baby girl. I never will :( 

2. School busy busy. We in our stories now till second week of November. So I only go for an hour each time to read stories and talk about them. I dont talk much. Mine is still weeks away. So I just go cause I have to. Yeah. Cant (not) wait for mine on November 5th LOL

3. GYM just once almost twice. Did it on Monday. Also workouts for my arms per norm every other day. That is how we do it. And walks 3 total. Sunday, Tuesday & Thursday. Woohoo!

4. Work is blah! I am over work. I am getting hours but not enough. Yup. I did my therapy once this last week. I wanted to die. She moved my bad shoulder so much it hasn't stopped hurting and now I cant move it as much as I was able to. She kept saying frozen shoulder. But I'm now afraid she hurt me more what if its more than what they saw on the MRI. I am getting an MRI this week I pray so I pray I can afford it well someone can loan me money for it. I need to focus on my shoulder too not just my neck. I did acupuncture twice. I only have 2 more times of that, and 3 more times of therapy. Then what? I dont know! Injection? I dont see pain doctor till November 11th. Plenty of time to figure this out, pray pray pray and do my stretches. God willing I will be done with this thing before years end and get out of this job for real.

5. Church was beautiful on Sunday. It was hard after. I talked to my dear two friends and then I prayed with my pastor for my broken heart. Monday was hard as I said. I love my church. I love them all SO MUCH! I love you all!! Coming up to 3 years soon very soon wow. Love you church :)

That is all for now. Busy week is coming up. But less work and spending that less day with my dear friend. Have a great week. See ya next weekend. Stay safe and stay cool!!!

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, October 11th 2020)

 Welcome to the 2nd one of these for the month. I feel this month is so busy!! So much going on crazy stuff. How was your week?

1. Work blah. I worked all my shifts cause I had to and I am currently not getting enough hours so I can just not come in unless I need to do that. So far so good this week. Yikes. Anyways. That is what is work. Its stressful and on top of that I am starting to get panic attacks again. Which isn't a good thing :( I began getting them almost 2 weeks ago at work and only at work. So work is the issue. Its not at home its not anywhere else. Its work related. Ugh

2. Church was awesome on Sunday. I love it. Afterwards talking to people. Being prayed over by my friend. I love church. Hard to believe how close we are to being here for 3 years now. Crazy stuff. What a crazy ride 3 years has been for this church and me and this well everyone world especially this year. About a month from doing the women's studies again in person will go on for just 10 weeks. Last year was much longer. We began in October and went till May of this year of course from March to May was on zoom but yeah...

3. School is keeping me on my toes for sure. Last week we turned in our stories on Tuesday. Then Thursday we talked about how our groups work. This week we begin groups. Lucky me being in my group for the second half so I dont gotta show up as early. But I still gotta work. 2 stories per day to talk about. Mine wont be talked about till November 5th. This is gonna go on for a while half way through next month to get through them all. 

4. Gym just once a week again. But still had fun. Got over there on Monday evening. Yes. Plus doing my stuff at home still and walks when I can. Only one walk this week oh well. All good! Love the gym and love my walks too. 

5. So this week I began to do my therapy I did it twice this week and my acupuncture I only did once. So there was that. Next week I have it same but opposite. I have acupuncture twice and therapy once. Due to me trying for an MRI on my shoulder on the 20th I now will have therapy till end of the month. But still have almost two weeks after that to go to the doctor. I'm asking everyone to keep praying for me for my shoulder & neck injuries. This is literally God or nothing. I know God is using the stuff to help me. But its still God healing me. I know my bike accident wasn't my fault anymore then my work injury and the timing sucks as it was so close together when I was treating them but its how it was gonna happen. This year yikes.

Thats all for now. I am off while I write this on a Sunday :) Have a great week! Mine is busy and sad. More about that next time. God bless. Stay safe and stay cool. Heat is coming back again this week ugh.

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, October 4th 2020)

 Welcome to October!! This past week was just an example of my busy month ahead of me. Gulp Gulp. I decided to talk about all that I have gone through this month on a post a few days ago on my facebook. I didnt even include my teeth in that one. I talked lightly just saying all I had done this year or gone through including grief counseling, my work injury and all with that, my bike accident and of course losing my radio show. Top off with everything canceled that I didnt include, my depression and broken heart in the middle of it all I didnt include that either. But I did say what I know is true: God is in control & I am not and that is all I need to know! 3 months left of this year so much left that could go right or wrong BUT GOD...

1. Work I didnt do that much this week. A messed up schedule and a check I will for sure regret I gave up fighting. My result was working 2 times in 1 week. I worked on Saturday of last week, and then on Monday. That was all. I had asked for Wednesday off but got off on top of that Sunday & Friday. I did work on Saturday but thats a new work week, same check. My next check will suck. But hey same time I needed the extra time to work on my paper for school I finally got my story written. For real its done! Crap but done! Yeah! I have something to turn in on Tuesday. I am gonna look it over each day for the next few and see if I want to change it at all before I drop it on there Tuesday before class.

2. Church is beautiful. I love church. The message on Sunday was so gorgeous and so powerful I was crying. I had no idea it was an emotional day for me so I was crying all day. But it was still beautiful and spoke to my heart. My pastor whom I told after was like "that was the Holy Spirit" yes I knew that. When he said that Jesus suffered with us when we suffer I really was crying. Why Jesus. Did you come to die and then suffer with me just so I can know freedom and overcome because you did? Why? I will never fully get it but know that one day I will is about the only thing the only prize I get in the end. So yes I love church :) 

3. Gym did it just once cause we only had time for it once. Oh well! Did it after my MRI on Monday. I love the gym and we got to go back to our original GYM. This is the one right by my church, the sprinter and many places. Up until a few months ago I felt I lived on this corner. I was going to church twice a week, going to the sprinter for school and coming to the gym. We been going to the gym nearer my job but after my MRI this was closer. Was kinda nice and forgot how big this gym is compared to my other one. NO complaints I love the gym no matter which one I go to.

4. This has been a busy week for me. For my work related injury I got MRI on Monday told results on Wednesday when I see doctor. On Tuesday then pushed to Wednesday re check for my tooth and I healing fine so no problems there. Wednesday I had my pain specialist who told me that my MRI showed I have a cervical disc herniated in my right arm (that would be from my bike accident). My neck pain has been coming back full force for the past week plus almost 2 weeks now. After my appointment I went for my first acupuncture he focused on my neck and shoulders. I get 5 more of these. I was told my therapy was not approved but by Thursday that was changed to never mind it is. So I have that next week. This month will be therapy and acupuncture while working, doing school and praying if I should look into another MRI for my shoulder as they approved it after all. Waiting to hear back from them unsure what to do about that... I surely did a good number falling off my bike in July! Ugh

5. The 29th was my grandmas birthday. I was an extra big emotional mess being the first birthday without her and without Rainbow. I was crying hard all day long. So much pain it dripped from me. I want to heal I do but its so hard. We blew bubbles to heaven again not like last year we used a machine but still it was something. I still miss balloons and wish we could do them without hurting the environment. I miss you grandma and I miss you Rainbow.

This week isn't as exciting as last week HAHA. But it still has its perks. Have a great week everyone and a great month. God is still in control and I am still not and that is for sure okay by me. God bless you!!