Welcome to week 2 of these. Our weather has been rather crazy this past week. We had two different nights of freeze warnings. And rain this weekend. Some heat. Then cold again at night. I think Spring is coming but its taking its time and surely might come till March sorry that the ground hog might be wrong!
1. Work this week blah. My hours are improving which is good but thats about all that is improving. I need to look for a new job. I think the way things are going I hope to be gone by Summer is my goal. Till then yes I work still here and I still work hard and I am still stressed out by my job. Especially how they handle our breaks and issues that come when they do not do them right. AKA I have to walk away because they refuse to find someone to cover me on time for me to go. NOT MY FAULT! Sigh.
2. Gym did it just once. We got pizza Monday then we worked out. We planned a second one on Thursday but ran out of time and did not make it. Oh well. But I miss it. I wish I could work out every day but thats not possible. I miss when I used to do this before work at BRU that was a great time. I am unsure how I would survive today on the little hours I got but I liked it at the time I made it work!
3. School show 2 was great. Much better. I got to record it for one which was great. Things went smoothly. I feel it was a good show. I am on my way to getting homework done for my internship. And being hopeful I can complete one or two fast track online classes beginning in March I believe is when they begin. Wish me luck!
4. So few things happened sum them up here: Tuesday after my show I went to the church and spoke with my Pastor in counseling for my grief over my dog that I still miss so much. Some how it turned into my anxiety panic attacks and such. I am a mess btw. Not gonna say a lot except I got a lot of good ideas and help. But I am going to see him next week again because I realized I sadly hadn't said half of what I had planned to say. That is my ADD brain not getting it all out when I had so much to say while not knowing how this would go. Thursday before the study mom my sister and me went to the Safari Park its free for Seniors in February so mom got in for free we have passes. Only there like 2hrs but surely did a lot more than I thought. It was fun! I love my study I love so many people. You dont know how great it is to love people and have them love me back. Its always been so exhausting for me to love people and have them not love me back. I feel the love I know the love me. I will miss you all next week! We break up for meals and I'm not going again. So no study for two weeks :( wah!!
5. 2013 was a depressing year for me. I spent the whole year living off unemployment, applying for jobs non stop, going to interviews and getting no where. I was so depressed at times I would cry and cry and just want it to be over with. I truly look back on 2013 as a horrible year. I did see lots of movies because I had so much time. We also did our St Patricks Day Race and the following weekend the Hot Chocolate race. We still do this race every year we fell in love with it!! So that was some of the good for that year.
Well that is all for now. 17wks I miss you Rainbow still. I want to say I am okay but I am not. I might not cry as much as I usually do but I am still missing you so much. As I said on my post for today. When she died she took my heart and I am unsure if I can live without my heart. How can I do it? Please pastor help me!!!! :( See you all next week. God bless you always!!
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