The Weekend 5 (Sunday, April 3rd 2022)

Welcome to April! I love April its my favorite month of the year cause its an even number month #4 and its in Spring my favorite season :) Fun fact: my youngest sister has the middle name of April. 

1. Church welcome back I loved you all and missed you so much. I love my church. I love the hugs and the love and support I get for me. And all I am going through. And love meeting with my small group on Thursdays always such a blessing to meet with all these young ladies :)

2. Workouts. Did 2 walks this week but no gym. My sister is out of town so no gym but hope back next week. I love me walks. I also love putting up flyers for church so people can come join us for Easter. Come join us!!

3. Work is busy. But less this week again. I didnt work on Sunday but I did work rest of the week. We short handed. And this and my anxiety zero fun. Thank God my medicine works and I am okay now but I need to figure out how to deal so maybe just maybe one day I wont need a medicine to calm me down. God can do this!

4. Saw the peacocks for the first time since last year on Tuesday. Had a fun time. Most of it happened in the neighborhood not at the actual park they at. Cause that was where the action was. Funny fun times. I love these crazy birds. :)

5. The 29th marked 4 years since Babies R Us closed for good. Man I miss my store too. My fellow co workers all we had. I know I cant get it back but it still makes me sad they gone. I miss the company too and I wish they wouldn't have had to close even if I had never worked there. It made it twice as sad cause I did work there so yeah about that boo :(

See you next week. This week not super busy either but he we get by. Have a blessed week. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, March 27th 2022)

Welcome. Doing this on time but not posting it on time. OH WELL! It was that kinda week. Last one in March. Wow. 

1. The Hot Chocolate race was so awesome on the 20th!!!!! The only thing I didnt like was they didnt have the plastic mugs they had 3 years ago. I've missed this race so much. Shocking maybe not so much but still is that not as many did the race! We usually are at the back in either H or G. This time? E! Wow! But other then that it was a nice day. The rain went away thankfully. We made the train on time. After we done (yes I missed you church sadness!) we were gonna go to the zoo. Instead we made our way to Little Italy. We walked around had breakfast well brunch maybe as we had breakfast before the race. Went to a few random stores bought some random stuff. Sadly still in our race clothes no changing till we out of the area. So after a few hours (and my sister said she felt like she lived there LOL) we headed out. Went by store on the way home and I got some Jamba Juice cause I wanted it. Back home to chill and enjoy rest of my Sunday of freedom.

2. Our little group met on Thursday which made me extra happy we meeting last week and this week too. Cause I didnt do church this was my church. I love the hugs and all that. Yes I love my little group :)

3. Workouts just did one. Not counting the race. But it was a nice workout. A walk and worked on rocks for my friend. I had a nice day on Thursday except some stuff. Ugh. Below

4. Work this week was not as busy thankfully. I was off on Sunday. I did work like normal Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Saturday. Work is a bit stressful though. And me getting a new job needs to happen soon as I can. SOON AS I CAN!

5. This week was full of appointments for me. So many. Tuesday I went and got my blood drawn. Then since I had to fast we had breakfast out and then met with my good good friend and helped plant her Jasmin plant. Beautiful smelling thing. Wednesday I talked to my therapist and a had a big for me break through. A hard one but a big one. Thursday I first had my psychiatrist which was good cause now I have more anxiety medicine. Then I went for my eye appointment only to find out they suddenly dont take my insurance anymore :(  so I had most of my appointment no cost as they didnt take it and then I left. So yes lots this week busy busy.

This week is slower and not as much. Yup. Have a good one. See you in April. God bless you :) 

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, March 20th 2022)

Welcome. This week did not go as planned. That is a good way to put it ugh

1. Work nope. I didnt work much at all. When I did work I felt like crap. I worked on Sunday & again on Friday. I had Saturday off for the hot chocolate race (more next week). I got sick probably food poisoning on Monday & Tuesday and stayed off also on Wednesday. So I am down on my PPTO and now have 4pts. Yikes. Till April 29th next 1 drops. I need to keep working on leaving I cant be here forever I might lose my mind!

2. Thursday I went for my psychical finally. And then found out that I have to do a bloodwork where I fast :( so yeah about that. So I go back this week for that fun. Not really. This week is super busy. Shorter but busy ugh.

3. Workouts not much. I did a walk just on Thursday. Due to being sick I not only lost work, I lost our last gym for several weeks. The race day after we not gonna. And the following week my sister wont be home. So oh well guess not for a few gym oh well...

4. Church beautiful on Sunday. I gave my friend my 20 rocks for the next two weeks she good! And I was super happy to go on Thursday too to the study. I love my group of friends we are so awesome and talk for hours. Its just a great time. :)

5. My mental health is just not doing so great. I feel like a massive lonely failure. I'm getting dips and days where I cry and cry. Some have a reason some do not. My racing thoughts woke me up twice this week. Back to overthinking and not sleeping and insomnia. This week I talk to both my doctors. And I hope I have some good visits. Cause I need some good news.

Have a good week. Next week is gonna be busy busy. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, March 13th 2022)

Welcome. How are you doing how was your week

1. Work busy per usual. I did call out last Sunday I wasn't sick but I didnt feel good. Ick. So I only worked 4 days this week. Yes work busy. We lost another co worker she didnt make it 3 months :( they playing switch a roo and guess what we still down a person. Life isn't fun. I just need to you know survive it till I get out of my job too. Carefully.

2. Workouts just did walks this week. We skipped gym again. Maybe not such a good idea being we so close to the race. But that is what we did. Oh well. We are almost to race day yes we are.

3. Church was beautiful I love my church. Gave my friend rocks. Hugs for my friend going back home. So much love. And Thursday thank God we got to go. I was so happy. We had a great time there too. Yes. Love going to our group studys. :)

4. Tuesday I went out to dinner with a friend from our group. Was a fun night. I love hanging out with people and friends that I love. Great night! 

5. Me and my issues continue to be a mystery. I had a dip this week again. Not as bad as last time but still a dip. I also admitted something about what I am going through to my co worker. This is co worker number 2. Idk how I keep admitting it. Maybe the stigma will go away with me piece by piece as I tell more people about what I have been going through. All while trying to get better in God and all I am doing. I am not gonna give up on ME not one bit.

Busy week ahead here. Just a few more days this week and by this time next weekend we will be done with our race. Yes!! Hard to believe its been 2 years since all our normal went away due to c*. Have a good one. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, March 6th 2022)

Welcome to March! Hello! I feel weird I'm writing this on a Saturday and I'm not at work. More below. :) Happy Saturday and Sunday everyone!!

1. Church was beautiful on Sunday. I gave my friend rocks and 2 days later she down to 2 of 10. So I am working on more. I love my friends and hugs and love. Sunday is my FAVORITE day of the week. I love everyone so much :)

2. Work busy this week but less days hurray. I only worked 4 days. I had Saturday off for (see below). Busy and stuff. I'm grateful for breathers like more people and things covered like breaks and lunches. But when there is too many of us it still feels stressful its the weirdest thing EVER. LOL. Oh well. 

3. Tuesday was a great day. I went on a walk with my dear friend from church. I love her so much! We walked by the water this time unlike last time I didnt have to work after. Went in the afternoon low Tide we walked all the way to the pier and beyond and back. I was sure tired. But it was so fun. Blessed refreshing walk with my friend. We cant seem to help doing walks now each time she out visiting. I pray she's here for good soon like she wants to be!

4. Saturday was the memorial for my friend her husband went to heaven in January. I missed her so much. I made sure she got two hugs of love from me. And I gave her a rock I made especially for her. I hope when she finally opens it she loves it. :) 

5. Therapy on Wednesday was okay. I am fooling myself and my therapist. I made myself think I am OKAY with therapy once a month I AM NOT! On Sunday I had my first dip in over a month. I couldn't stop crying and having panic attacks. Then on Thursday I had a HUGE let down that made me cry off and on for hours. I never do this. Twice in one week like this isn't great. So Monday I'm gonna see if I can talk to my therapist sooner then next month. I think I need to go back to once every two or three weeks not once a month. With the medicine it doesn't mean I am fully okay. The medicine is only helping tame my emotional best. Its still there hidden. I have tons of issues TONS OF ISSUES to deal with. I am not doing good still. So yeah about that...ugh mental health is exhausting trying to get it better its so hard when I waited so long. I should have tried this years ago not just last year and being my age :(

Well have a good week. Mine is more normal this time around. Less fun. But I have some plans. God bless you always :)