Welcome to May! So far May is looking a lot like April :( but trying to remain hopeful that things are gonna change soon. They are slowly changing. SLOWLY CHANGING. Like beaches opening and soon other things... hopeful that May doesn't end like April. Us stuck at home and still no church boo!
1. Rainbow my love. I miss you more than I can. But for the first time in a while I didnt cry today. Not once. Not when I put up her picture. Not when I thought about it. Do I miss her still? YOU BET! Do I think I am over it? NO WAY! But I think it means time truly does heal all wounds. And the wounds I thought were not healing have been. And Jesus has been healing my brokenness. I think I am on my way to being okay. Still missing her so much while not figuring out the middle ground the spot she left when she died. Now I cant promise I wont cry again that wont happen. I still mourn her. I am still grieving. I am still messed up from her and all this loss. But even that seems to fade. As time fades and goes on I have begun to forget what it was like to hug people at church. Much like Rainbow I am starting to forget to the point that its okay now. I am numb. Maybe I am in my denial stage I am unsure what part of grief I am over church. But I am somewhere in the middle. 29 weeks Rainbow I still miss you I swear just not like I thought...
2. Work this week blah blah blah. Well now in San Diego county we gotta wear masks ALL THE TIME! So I hate this. So instead of walking around the store on breaks lunches or when off with freedom I am stuck in the same mask I had for work. Trust me once I am out of the store it comes off. It flies off. Well people are just attitudes of attitudes about a rule a law that we did not make. We force them to wear them or they cant come inside. Haha. Been stuck in our masks since April 4th. Join the club! So that was stressful. I did work less again a second week of only 4 days. Next week is my last one. Back to 5 days for the next 2 oh boy! But yeah that is work.
3.ZOOM we are almost done with these. Just 2 more to go. Then our last one. Way things are going I have NO Idea what is gonna happen. Our governor is insane and keeps changing stuff. But I am still praying we will be back at church before we finish this. Frankly I just wanna see my friends from church from our group. But I keep doing ZOOM I am very faithful. Every single week I show up.
4. Workouts I did a wii fit and 2 different times I did a Zumba. I might even do one today before work we shall see. Haha. But yeah I miss the gym but I have to admit working out at home has its benefits. Besides I dont see anyone and they dont see me. I love Zumba the most but its terribly exhausting. 45min is painful. It like good pain. Fun and exhausting but good pain.
5. Hard to believe the 1st & 2nd marked the two biggest days of the Great Nashville Flood of 2010. That means its been 10 years since this flood happened. I miss Nashville. That flood was horrible. It ruined our mall. It was never the same. It took 2 years for it reopen and half of the stuff didnt come back that we loved. We were actually in California when it re opened in 2012. But I wont ever forget that flood. It was something else to live for.
Well have a great week everyone!! Hard to believe are now 1 week from Mothers Day. We wont be going out to eat of course. But will be doing whatever. Sadly it also falls on the 14th years since my grandma died. So that wont be fun :( I work a full shift that day much like last year I work but I didnt even bother with all this going on because I figured no point nothing will be open. Now they are saying restaurants might be open unsure what that means. See you all then. God bless you!!
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