The Weekend 5 (Sunday, January 1st 2023)

Welcome to this new month and new year. Welcome 2023.

1. Work has been so busy busy. Last weekend it was busy for Christmas. This year it was busy for New Years. I am kinda glad we made it through the holidays. They are so stressful for me all the time. But work is work is work.

2. Church was great on Christmas. We went to a different church. It was a fun time. I loved it. I love my church ever so much :) Last time in 2022 was at a new place and at a new place on the 1st today woohoo

3. Christmas was a busy day for me. After church home to nap and gifts and eat. We ate late. I am glad that this time the meal was good. Yeah for a good meal. No plans for New Years Eve. Just work and work some more.

4. Tuesday I slept all day long. I slept as much as I could. Needed it a lot. Thursday did Safari Park one last time and actually only time we did it for this year. Yup. Weird. Had fun more than the zoo. More lights, more time, more animals. I loved our trip it was great. 

5. Therapy was a good time. Not so good was doing it in the car when it raining and then SDG people walking around and starring at our meter why me. But yes I am have made such progress this year with my therapy. I know I have such a long way to go. Such a long way. But this year has been so much for me. I am grateful that I am still here. So many days I almost wasn't. Its so hard to tell without saying too much. 

Well here we are in 2023. Any plans for the new year? I dont make resolutions but I am gonna work on a few goals personal and maybe share them. Have a blessed week. God bless you :) 

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, December 25th 2022)

Welcome to the last one of these for this year. How crazy is that. And a big Merry Christmas to you all!! How was your week? One more week of this year is about to come about.

1. Work has been busy so busy oh my. As the week went on it got worse and worse. The weekend was the worst it was busy Sunday so much and Monday. I called out Wednesday but thats okay. I had enough to cover it. I needed it. See below. Friday and Saturday are insane. I am glad we closed on Christmas day

2. Church is so beautiful anytime. I am glad people came back haven't seen in weeks or months. And for talks with my special friends. And for my close friend she knows who she is you are blessing my heart everyday. Kinda hard to believe we are done with the Senior Center wow. Onto a new place in two weeks. Today we meet at a temporary for today place. Next week a new location. Crazy how we keep moving on without the ones who had to leave us this year....

3. I am now 43. My birthday was a lot of fun. We had breakfast by the beach. We saw whales and the aquarium. Then dinner and coffee. What a fun day. I am grateful for all the love of everyone who are grateful every day I am still here. Thank you all!!

4. Wednesday we went to the zoo last time. Ugh. We cant renew the passes yet. We will try soon just unsure when. Working on this. But we had some fun at the zoo breakfast before and dinner after. Oh and saw lights at Coronado hotel :) 

5. This year has been something left. I cant possibly rewind and talk about everything in my last number but I can say this much: I am changing more and more everyday. This year I learned to let go while holding on, to heal, to stop being so negative, who my true friends are, to be more open, to love more, to feel and allow myself to feel, to continue in Jesus to heal, to know that tomorrow isn't promised and no matter how hard some days are to never give up. God has me Jesus guide me cant wait to see what 2023 holds.

Have a blessed last week of 2022. See you all in 2023!!!!! 

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, December 18th 2022)

One more of these before we done with this month and this year. I will think about a possible wrap up on my last blog for this year shall see.

1. Just a few days from my next birthday. The next time I write this I will be the next number of 43. So much has happened since I last had a birthday this year so much testing so much wow. I managed another birthday thing with 2 friends on Tuesday at a Mexican food place. It was a very good time. We ate food then sat talking for hours. Like 5 min from our house. These two lovely ladies couldn't make the party last Thursday. Fun time all around. 

2. Church less people makes me sad :( there are reasons but so many still not here. Not cause they left its because they simply have things. It was nice to see some on Thursday just sad not here again. I hope for our LAST Sunday ever in this building everyone can show up one more time. Fingers crossed. I love my church still of course. 

3. Had a lot of rain this past week on Saturday Sunday and Monday this past week. Yikes. I am glad its gone at least for now oh please yes for my birthday last days till I have something going on. I did a walk this past week just one. My first in weeks. Yes so glad!!

4. Work is busy busy. I called out on Wednesday due to a doctors on phone appointment. Its okay I will just be at 2 points by end of month I have one more point to drop and I do plan a call out next week but will use my PPTO. 

5. I hate this sinus infection. I got some stronger medicine will be trying tomorrow praying this works I am over this thing ugh. Had my therapy on Thursday not much else. Did a lot but didnt leave house much except for a walk. 

Well here we are at the end and thankfully this will be up on time. Have a good last week see you all on Christmas. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, December 11th 2022)

This is 2 weeks worth since most things remain same week to week I'm updating them both cause I fell behind. So Sorry!!! Next weekend on time and all.

1. Work has been busy busy. Stressful and well its the holiday. Making due best we can. Yup. I haven't managed to call out in a few weeks which is good. But no promises haha. I dont call out that often to be honest. 

2. Church is beautiful week after week I love them. I am glad our pastor is back yeah!! That is great. Whats most amazing for me is how God has softened my heart up to this pastor. I was so sad when ours left. My eyes open to what happened and my healing as I forgive him is what that is hard for me. But God has answered my prayers. I am learning to hug and love my new pastor and that is what is making life easier for me. God is good and in control. Its just been a tough year for not just me but so many others. 

3. The 1st I went back to the endocrinologist and I was disappointed in what he didnt tell me which was what I needed help with. The medicine continues to fail me. I still have face hair I still have break outs. His answers wasn't up the dose again but give me 2 pills for me to take instead of 4. Nothing else kinda sucks. So my therapy on the 2nd was early morning I did it in my sisters car which was nice and private. She told me I have the will to live. Isn't that amazing. Cause till she told me I didnt think I had it. Gods got me 100%.

4. The 6th was my sisters birthday yeah. She's the big 40 wow!! Welcome to the 40's exhausted and achy trust me you feel it. But her eye sight like mine is 100% I broke the curse. I'm almost to 43 so I am almost 3 years past when I should have gotten glasses lol. So we didnt do much for hers. Breakfast. The mall and Red Robin (sadness they closed the one in La Jolla for GOOD :( ) Then he dinosaur thing in San Diego. It was fun once we found it. Harsh till we did :( ugh. Her cupcakes yummy her day not bad.

5. Thursday the 8th was my party with my great friend Nikki. We went to Pf Changs and had several women show up and enjoyed their company. I even got gifts. Btw I loved people coming more than gifts and no gifts was fine. I take cards and hugs and love way above a new item. But I was grateful for what I got too of course. I loved we did this. I loved that God allowed so many to come. I loved that it worked out. I will not regret this ever. It was the best decision and I am so grateful to everyone who came out to celebrate both of us :) 

Whelp this week is less but still something. Next week my birthday week shall see but lots going on. Just wish I could kick in the pants my never going away sinus infection that I am now working to see a doctor for AGAIN. :( God bless you all. See you next Sunday :) 

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, November 27th 2022)

Welcome to the last one of these for this month. Crazy we are just 3 days away from December. And with two birthdays plus 2 holidays plus things its just so wow gonna be crazy and I hope fun.

1. Work is going okay I guess. I pray I'm over this sinus infection. I called out on Wednesday cause I couldn't call out for almost a full week before this. I still had it but finished my medicine up. God willing its gone. So work is busy we are officially in holiday season. Woohoo maybe haha

2. Church I love my church. I love all who go there and all who dont. I still love them. I really love my pastor on Sunday. I really loved how he talked about being okay with mental health and taking medicines something my former pastor was not okay with. Life is so confusing right now. But I kinda wish and pray if its God will He will let him stay as our pastor. 

3. Wednesday after I called out we went down got our packets for the race and did a beach day. The water was so far back that we walked for long long time down the shore in one direction. It was a beautiful day in general. I loved the beach. It was a good break from cleaning for the holiday. Yes it was a good day.

4. Turkey Trot was wonderful. I love we doing this race. We wanted to do it for a while. Volunteered for it 11 years ago. And we are now in our 2nd year of doing it. Fun fun time. Thanksgiving is okay but not fun at all in so many ways. Life at my home is so stressful it was one of those times I think work would have been less stressful.

5. Psychiatrist went well. Catching her up every 2 months on me and making sure my medicines work. I talk to her again in January. I am less then 2 weeks from my next endocrinologist talk about blood work and things. Oh boy.

This week could be busy or not. Shall see. Either way. We are off to December. Have a blessed week. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, November 20th 2022)

Welcome. Hard to believe today marks exactly 1 month till my next birthday. Time is flying by. Hard to believe how close we are to the end of this year. Yikes

1. Church on Sunday much better with more people for sure. Yes for sure. I  am glad for that. I miss them all so much you know. I dont think I ever will not. But sometimes its easier to just slip in and forget I once had a great church with wonderful people. I love all who are still there and of course them who left but its still hard for me so very hard.

2. Work has been its usually busy unfun time. I am getting by but not easily. A few more days I hit 4 years. My longest ever at a job. Last jobs I've had I almost did but never made 4 years. This will therefore be the longest I have ever been at ONE job. WOW

3. Mid week studies are over after this week. Sadly. I love our studies I'm sad its so short grateful I made all 6 and was blessed still. I also tried out the study at the other church which was fun a potluck. I loved more fun was seeing people I miss and love. So much. Hugging them. I do plan to go back when I can long as I can get a ride and dont have other plans. Heres to new beginnings. 

4. I had such a busy week. I took my iPod down which is broken sadly. I got bloodwork done. I did a doctor appointment got more medicine for my sinus infection second one this year. I hate this. 

5. Therapy is good. I always go in there with plans and then sometimes dont talk about what I was thinking about. We go off. But its fine. I always try to stick to some things first and deal with it. I am glad for therapy I am thankful to God for what its doing for me :)

See you all in a week. One last Sunday in November. Happy Thanksgiving!!! God bless you all :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, November 13th 2022)

Welcome. On time. Right date and time. Yes. Sorry about last week oopsie.

1. 15 years now since we moved into our place in TN. Hard to believe it. Our journey to TN was 100% crazy stuff. but I will never regret that move not one bit at all. I loved TN fell in love the first time we visited in 2007 and we had never been there before that...

2. Work is same busy busy. Yup. I am glad to have hours but sad to see them cut again. I cant believe I'm heading to my 4 years with the company we are less then a month away from that. I wonder if I will make 5 years so I can get that 5 year badge...??

3. Church was great but less people made me sad. And more leaving too makes it sadder. But Thursday was great too. I am so happy with our group and so sad we have just one more left then back to only Sundays for the time being :( boo

4. I am sick I think its a sinus infection I wont know for sure till I talk to doctor next week. I am sure its not covid but whatever it is, its sure annoying. Ugh. I hate being sick

5. We got a lot of rain on Tuesday was pretty crazy. I did the chiropractor twice this week and I am improving greatly. Still not there not healed. But way better then how they left me last year releasing me as permanent and stationary. 

See you all next week. This is gonna be a busy week for me YIKES!! Have a good one. God bless you :) 

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, November 6th 2022)

Welcome to November. Hard to believe we are now skipping down the last two months of the year. Crazy. Sorry this is going up late I didn't intend it but it just happened :( 

1. Hard to believe its been 15years since we moved to TN. 15 years since our lives changed. We were on a long hard road and a trip that so many thought we shouldn't take. But in the end God had us in His hands and we got to our place and our lives changed forever. I miss TN so much sometimes. And then I dont. I was a different person back then. All our pets we began with now gone. But yes 15 years crazy stuff

2. Church was wonderful. I love church time and hugs and love. Our study on Thursday always so beautiful and fun. I enjoyed it so much I am sad we only have 2 left boo

3. Tuesday we didnt go to the beach we hung out with my cousin and her son instead. We had fun. Except me I slept wrong on my shoulder and neck. The pain was so bad I couldn't go do anything at the bouncy place called Sky Zone. I just watched them play. 

4. I was in too much pain on Wednesday so I called out. Friday before work I went to the chiropractor she fixed up some issues and told me come back next Tuesday to make sure they sticking. Ugh I sometimes truly hate my two injuries.

5. Work is busy busy. Sure I missed a day in there but yeah busy is as busy does. Stressful as is. I get by. I am almost at my 4 year remark crazy stuff. 

See you all in a week. Hope I am on time next week I will ever so much try!!

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, October 30th 2022)

Welcome to the last of these for October. I can't believe I am saying that. Wow!!

1. Church is always such a beautiful place. I love my church. Even with so many now at others and its hard at times I know I am supposed to be there. I love all my dear family that goes here still and also those who no longer do. Thursday was nice. We are half way through our 6 week study. Its a nice time. I love going. Its a beautiful time to chat and be happy with my family. I love them all so dearly :)

2. Work is busy per usual. I did call out on Wednesday cause I didnt feel like working. I had coverage of money for the hours so that good. Other then that. I am busy and doing stuff. And having attitudes I dont understand and then questioning that. I am like one big over thinker and work is a great place to overthink too much. Ugh.

3. Didnt make the gym again at all. We would have gone Wednesday had I not called out but we didnt. I did take a walk and ride the bike first time in weeks. Wow. So that was nice. Hopefully we can do the gym soon as we can. Its hard to go and harder to not go. If we gonna get in shape we gotta do it.

4. Tuesday after we cleaned we did a nice beach day. It was nearly perfect. Breakfast and the water so low the tide we walked so far in both directions. It was an awesome time loved it had so much fun :)

5. Wednesday I finally met up with my two good friends. This is a first of many I plan to meet up with them again. Soon as our schedules work and such. I learned a lot of stuff that kinda shocked me. I am still not done processing it. Its just a lot and you think you know someone and then this comes along and you are like what. So yeah God has this and me and them but its hard.

This next week is busy busy. Have a good one. God bless you :) 

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, October 23rd 2022)

Welcome again here we are. Speeding through this month. This is crazy how fast we flying in this month. That means we have barely 2 months left of 2022 what on earth!!

1. Heat wave. We have a heat wave. Yup. Like SUPER hot on Wednesday, somewhat both Thursday & Tuesday. Ugh. I mean dont get me wrong. I love some warm weather in the fall and it means beach days. But too much heat is just too much ugh no fun. Its making it hard for me to do things when I home like paint rocks, or do anything. So I'm good if the heat goes away until next year I'm fine....thanks! We did have a nice time at the beach Tuesday. It was hot and less rocks. We had fun. I love my beach days I'm gonna miss them when they gone for sure

2. GYM finally got back to it. Just one time. And not even barely 30min. Time we got in there I did like 15min of actually doing it. But we did try so thats good. And yes we did something. We failed at Monday so this was Wednesday before I went to work....

3. Work is busy busy. We still short handed. Like all the time. The stress on top of me is just no fun. I still dont handle it well. I'm doing better no putting me down but boy I still struggle. Mental break downs, anxiety and panic attacks even hyperventilating my idea of a good time is NOT crying in the bathroom on break or after work because work got me so bad I just melted into my emotions. Ugh

4. Church is a beautiful time. I still miss so many. And our temporary pastor I kinda missed him cause we had a guest speaker. I still love my hugs and love. Thursdays continue to be awesome. I love them and they are so short lived but I am just glad we doing SOMETHING after I thought for sure we doing nothing. 6 weeks is better then no weeks.

5. Therapy this week was tough cookie. Last time this time. I cried my eyes out after. I just broke and its okay I know thats okay. Its the process of getting better the process of God healing me the process of letting go. Its not easy man its tough its so hard but God has me I can do everything in Christ strength. So I keep showing up and working on me and I believe Gods healing me. Yes He is PTL

So one more of these before end of month. Crazy talk. Have a blessed week. Stay cool. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, October 16th 2022)

Welcome friends welcome. How was your week?

1. Work is busy! I worked most of my shifts but Wednesday I had off (more below). So yeah work is busy. We are short handed and it stresses the crap out of me. I want to say I am okay I am not. I try to be and God willing one day I will be totally. I think I'm doing better. Me trying to be proud like my therapist tells me oh boy. I'm trying I promise

2. Church was beautiful Sunday. I love all my friends. Sure I miss the ones who left us but I do love the ones who stayed. And that is what I love most is that I can love them all even when they aren't here if I keep giving it time which I am trying so hard to do so...  Thursday we began our small 6 week fall bible study. Fun times. Love all those ladies. I am glad we doing something. Its the shortest one I've ever done since I began to do them. Its shorter then even the Summer one. But its SOMETHING so no complaints. 

3. Tuesday I needed the sleep I got. Like 12 hours I was exhausted. But boy was shocking that day. We had a big unplanned unknown to us thunder storm. The thunder came first then the rainbows and then the rain. And followed by oh my goodness us losing power for 10min. Scary stuff. But we okay now and its gone. 

4. My mental health has been more better this week. Less struggling like last week. But still some struggles. As we got closer to the anniversary of my dogs death I think my anxiety and my stress got a bit worse. I was glad it was over with and gone. The building is what got me. Lots to talk to my therapist about next week I guess...

5. Wednesday was harsh. Its been 3 years since my beautiful Rainbow left me. I still miss her SO much. Its easier all the time but still so hard. I cried making her rock. I cried putting at the memorial. But I got work off. After we had breakfast we put the rock down and then discovered what the heck someone took hers from last year or moved it. Either way I couldn't find it :( Then after that we went to the zoo for several hours. It was fun exhausting but fun. Got home late. Threw me off doing something on a Wednesday I for sure thought today was gonna be Friday LOL.

Well thats all for now. This week a little like last week but a little not too. Shall see. God bless you :) 

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, October 9th 2022)

 Welcome. Making sure I do this ON TIME this week! Goals!!

1. Church beautiful on Sunday. I cant wait for our bible studies to start up and praying I can make it just 6 times come on not that hard right. I love my family even the ones I miss....

2. Work busy. I called out on Sunday due to issues with my back and cyst no fun. I had enough protected. I am sad they wont change my hours even after I talked to my supervisor Wednesday. What gives? Also still waiting for them to approve my time off for next month for harvest crusade. I'm going like it or not just will have to call out if they dont approve it soon. Sigh. 

3. GYM did not on Monday really but did Wednesday before work. Had a nice workout. Trying to break in my new shoes I got in 2020 and still haven't broke in. Trying to get in shape isn't fun but I do love working out just not working out haha

4. Tuesday we cleaned then did the beach. Fun times. It was overcast and the waves mean with the rocks but fun. We MIGHT get breakfast then go to the harbor next week. Shall see. Fall what Fall? Its still sunny and hot here in Cali. LOL

5. Therapy Thursday. I have had a bad week of struggling. So this wasn't but was necessary time for sure. Glad for some ideas. I cant give up I gotta keep going and working and not give up on ME. For real 

See you all next weekend. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, October 2nd 2022)

 Welcome. So Sorry I skipped this last week. It was a busy week and I felt too overwhelmed to have time to write this too. So this is for September 25th as well. Enjoy

1. Work is busy and feels busier. But its still what it is. Work. I get stressed out. We get short handed yes that is what work is in retail for sure. My first week back after vacation wasn't fun I wanted to go back to AZ. I kinda still do. 

2. Workouts not that much. Some walks. And we went back to the gym finally this last week on the 28th. So that was great. Hope this week we can at least go once or twice more. I love the gym but so hard getting back IN shape.

3. Church is beautiful so much. I love my church. I do. I miss my pastor I miss all that. It breaks my heart so much change but I know God will get me through it day by day He will. 

4. Had my Psychiatrist on the 21st will meet again in November. And my therapist on the 22nd. It exhaust me doing them so close together. Yikes!Working on me isn't easy but I wont give up trying. I went back to my chiropractor on the 28th finally and it helped but my neck pains are not fun and I am unsure why some old pains are coming back sigh.

5. Grandmas birthday on the 29th we went to the beach like we do once a week and we blew bubbles. I miss her so much. No matter how long she gone I shall miss her.

6. This week was so busy I added a number 6. On Tuesday went to a meal to say good bye to my pastor and his wife. Not as many came as planned. I am grateful I was able to do go. I will miss them so much. And Saturday went to a baby shower. It was a lot of fun and I am glad I got off work to go. Yes I had fun indeed.

Have a blessed week. Mine is not as busy. But still so. God bless you :) 

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, September 18th 2022)

Welcome. One more of these for this month what the? And this coming week we step into FALL for real. Summer is gonna be gone in days. This year is truly flying by. Unsure if I like that so much...

1. Church was beautiful on Sunday. Till we got sad news our Pastor is leaving us to go back to HC where he began. I know he had issues with his stroke 2 years ago. This news just broke my heart. Right before our vacation. Seriously sad news not good timing either boo :( 

2. September 11th is always a sad day for me as many others. Its sad for those who lost someone. But its sad for anyone alive. We all remember. It was a heart breaking day. 21 years later I will NEVER forget 9/11. I pray no one every forgets even those who have to be told about it because it happened before they born....

3. Our vacation in 3 parts. Sunday last week we left late around closer to 3pm. And we hit rain going towards Arizona. I think that was our sign of things to come. Ugh. No fun. Almost flooding. We came into Arizona around 8pm and checked in about 8:30pm. Lake Havasu was our first stop. We there Sunday night till check out on Monday morning. Very nice place we stayed that first night. Loved it almost perfect. Saw London Bridge in the morning. Clouds and beauty a nice day out in general. Then we began our journey to Williams.

4. Our journey from LH to Williams was NO fun at all. First we had rain and then flooding on the 40 so we had to turn around as we could have drowned in the car. We stayed in an Arby's for like an hour waiting out the bad rain and thunder and lightning. It was pretty scary. We got on the famous 66 and the weather behaved for a bit. Then we saw a beautiful full rainbow. We saw ahead dark clouds no idea what we going into. Then began pounding rain, thunder, lightning and HAIL not small like medium sized. We pulled over to try to wait for it to slow down for several minutes. Praying and crying and freaking out. We finally decided to just keep going and we did. It finally calmed down we saw our second full rainbow. Then we driving and hit our third storm same stuff hail and all. The hail got so bad we went under the roof of a gas station with several cars to wait it out. Finally thank God we okay to go so we went on the 40 again. We got to William just fine. Checked in. Even tried out the indoor spa and pool. Spa was super nice! Tuesday was more busy for us because it rained we decided to do Bearizona and it was a lot of fun. Looked at the animals even in the rain they out. We also before we went snuck in a nap after breakfast lol. Got food came back chilled rest of the evening. Wednesday we went to the Coaster park and rode the tube slide and the roller coaster SO FUN! Then we came back got Jackie and headed to The Grand Canyon. Of course it rained when it shouldn't do it. We not happy. But we made best of it. Once we climbed up to the canyon it was cold and cloudy but the rain kinda paused. So we got a few shots several places got some souvenirs headed back. Got food and went back to relax. 

5. Thursday we headed out of beautiful William to our next stop in Scottsdale. Took a few hours. We settled in. And relaxed at our new stop. Got dinner and bed. Friday we headed to Yuma. But first we went to Queen Creek to my sisters friends farm and visited with the animals. Then we went to Yuma. Got dinner at Cracker Barrel. Then back and head. On Saturday we left to come home. It was my youngest sisters birthday and we went to dinner with the family at Rubys. And that ends our vacation. Although I off today when I write this (Sunday) I go back this week on Monday sadness!

Have a blessed week. I'm back to work and such. And appointments. But look forward to days off again in the future. God Bless you :) 

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, September 11th 2022)

 Welcome again. I am doing this nearly on time um go me!! How are you how was your week?

1. We been in the mist of a heat spell. An ugly one that is taking all my energy and sleep!! I slept better on Friday night then I had all week. I had the fan ON my bed with me and still it didn't help me. Most nights I woke up a lot more than I would have and it really doesn't help me much at all. I hate heat in general I am always warm so this wasn't fun at all :( boo. Then we had rain on Friday & some on Saturday from a near by tropical storm. Swear.

2. Church beautiful. I love talking to my family and friends. And free coffee was yummy. And I especially love the hugs I get and the love I feel. My church is family there is nothing else like it.

3. Work busy this week BUT I didnt work on Wednesday due to my dads birthday and yesterday (Saturday) began my 9 days off for vacation. I am using 6 days of paid time off and only one is a day off no pay. So most are gonna be paid. I dont care either way cause work is so dang stressful. Ugh. So glad to be free.

4. Tuesday we did our last beach day and much like so much in the past couple of weeks it had to have issues. I swear every day up till we leave issues. Our beach closed to put more sand on it. So :( we got food and went to a near by opening. We still had fun but not the same. Then again not having to battle rocks in the water was really nice. See ya in 2 weeks beach! 

5. I had therapy on Thursday first time in 3 weeks. I have issues I am dealing with nearly all the time. I used to think I was okay only going once a month. NOPE. I need it every two weeks heck some weeks I want it every week. And I believe God is using it to help me heal. I know its true. I am doing better then I was a year ago. That is God right there. For real.

Whelp this is our vacation. We leave today (Sunday) come back Saturday. So unsure how my one next weekend will go. Maybe I'll wait do it two weeks again in one. Shall see :) God bless. Have a good week!!

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, September 4th 2022)

This is a catch up of the last two weeks so I didnt do one on August 28th for the week before it. So this is that week and the week that just passed. Sorry I been so busy and its not a fun kinda busy either :/

1. Church is beautiful. I love going to church every Sunday. Its such a blessing to go to church. I love my church family and my friends I love hugs and prayers and all that. I just love church in general :)

2. Work is busy busy. Short handed again people keep getting sick in our department and that is not making it fun especially since we dont have that many left. So my stress has been extra high. This weekend hopefully we get back some of the ones gone so we can at least be a bit more normal and calmer then we have been for over a month now

3. Did the beach on Tuesday last week and it was a fun time. The beach better. So that was a nice change. I love going to the beach. This past week on Wednesday we went to Coronado. First I had to call out of work because my other sister had a visit so we prepared for that and guess what not enough sleep. So I called out and we went to the beach instead. Fun day glad we got to do it!!

4. Got back into workouts well sorta tiny walks. I hope to be back into walks soon. I also had my endocrinologist appointment which went well on Thursday. This last Tuesday I did my cleaning for my teeth. They aren't so great cause I am not taking care of them. I really need to get back into it. Asap! Ugh! 

5. Its been 11 years since we on September 1st found we had to move from our apartment in AZ to here in Cali. A horrible 10 days of moving no idea why. I love so much about being home but some things I do miss too. Its how it is.

Whelp one more of these till vacation time. See you all then. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, August 21st 2022)

Welcome welcome to another fun filled week.  How was your week? Mine was okay

1. Work is busy busy as usual. But we more short handed, again, so I'm more stressed out. I have been taking my anxiety pills a lot more than usual for me. Like one every time I worked last weekend. And even this week. I am counting down till my vacation we are so very close indeed closer every week for sure :) I did have visitors this week friends that left church I haven't seen some in many months. So happy both Monday & Wednesday for hugs, pictures and lots of talking :) I welcome anyone who wants to come shop and talk to me. It makes my day :) 

2. Church was wonderful on Sunday. So fun and full of life and hugs. I always work hard each Sunday to carry my love of church to me with work. Does it work. Not always. But I do try. So yes I still very much love my church.

3. Did a beach trip on Tuesday after our cleaning. Our mom joined us. We debated but decided on our usual beach. Sadly like 2 weeks ago the rocks were harsh and the tide high. So we got our feet beat up. Yup. But this fatigue is no joke and its not gone not yet ugh

4. I did a small walk on Thursday very tiny. I walked around the block. Took me about 10 min. I walked slow but it still wore me out just like I thought. That didnt make me happy. My fatigue is still so harsh. I cant power walk without having a coughing fit. My fatigue this cough this covid stuff isn't fun almost a month since I got free from it. I will try again next week maybe the same thing just around the block till I get better and can do more like I used to. And I didnt even walk that much just not this little either. Sigh

5. Therapy was good on Thursday. Once again I talked about only one thing but that wasn't my plan. I mean I talked about other stuff but we ended up mostly talking about one of my bigger issues. So deep. I both love and hate therapy all at once. But I will keep doing it long as I need to so that could be rest of my life at this point...

Been so hot in our area. How are you doing? Summer is winding down. I enjoy the light later and will miss it in the Fall. But I could use a bit less heat. Have a good week. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, August 14th 2022)

Welcome. Hope you had a fab week. Mine was *okay* not much just *okay*

1. Work back to work is busy busy. I began back after two days off. And back we are. With less and less of us again. My anxiety is sky rocketing bad. I am not doing so well. Idk what is happening. Less then 2 weeks till my appointment with the endocrinologist. I look forward to what I will learn till then. I work and I pray and I carry on best I can. 

2. Did the beach once this week. Not a bad time. Sure I got sunburnt again ugh. But yeah had a fun time. Love our breakfast. The beach better this time. And had a bit more time this time too. I love living by the beach. We having a hot summer so beach time once a week is a MUST

3. My fatigue and energy are still too harsh for a walk. I will see maybe next week. I walk around work but its not the same thing. I do MISS my walks. I will see how I'm doing in a week and maybe just maybe begin to walk again. Wish me luck haha

4. Church beautiful on Sunday. Love and hugs. SO much. I love my church. I really do. I am grateful every day I get to go there and everyday God grows me with my church. I learn so much still. I just love it. GOD is SO good!!

5. We are 4 weeks from vacation. I am super excited for this coming up. I need a break tbh from life at home and work. My usual stresses its just no fun. God has me. Its okay. We still taking Jackie on walks and trying to begin to plan plan plan. 4 weeks from today we will be on our way WOOHOO!!

A slow week for me again. I miss book studies they kinda made me week. Sure I have cleaning and beach time but not same time. Yup. Have a good week. God bless you!!

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, August 7th 2022)

 Welcome to August. I had a busy week but less work how fun right

1. Worked only Sunday, Monday and Wednesday since I last wrote. I was off Friday & Saturday for stuff. Work is so stressful. Yet for some reason I was missing it on Friday. I think maybe I like to be stressed or something. Or was I just missing my co workers. I think we will go with that. Cause work is zero fun. Some days we have enough up there other days its just me closing which happened twice this week :( Ugh! 

2. On Tuesday after we cleaned a bit my sister and me went to the beach. We didnt get much time but at the same time it was enough. To be beat up by rocks cause thats all on the sand and the tide high. We enjoyed breakfast first yes yum. And even got a wee bit sunburnt. Our first time back since having c*vid. Which isn't gone btw the extras still hang onto me like nothing else. They come and go. Worse and better. Beach was fun. Just wish we didnt get so beat up by rocks! And I love rocks! LOL. After we got dinner at the fish place at the harbor before heading home. But trust me with this fatigue the beach and cleaning exhausted me so much I barely did anything else after I got home. Yawn.

3. Therapy on Thursday. We still dealing with me. I have been SUPER emotional this week. Idk what is causing it. Like everyday I'm crying some. I gotta keep an EYE on this for my next appointment with my psychiatrist cause I dont think this means my double dose of prozac is bad but I think I'm still adjusting too. Then again maybe this is my hormonal imbalance I know I have. Anyways. My last thing I talked to her about and I have decided to talk more in two weeks is verbal abuse that I had as a kid. I knew I was having it happen but I couldn't stop it. I know its affected me as an adult. I wish at times it was just one thing that happened in my childhood it was so much more. I spent so many years running from that without knowing how much my childhood was influencing my adulthood. How many relationships I have probably played a big part in wrecking because of issues I had that I had never dealt with. Working on me will be a long journey. I am grateful for the support of my friends and my sister who keep me going, God always healing me and the courage that comes from God to keep seeking more help. I am not gonna stop and I am gonna work on me as long as it takes. Jesus heal me please. Thank you!

4. Church Sunday was beautiful again. I love my hugs I love my friends. I loved the message it was right on point. I now know an answer that I never knew. If someone says "Why does God allow bad stuff to happen to good people" I will be "cause there are NO good people" and yes that includes every person on earth believers and not. The difference is Jesus paid the price for all and the believers not perfect at all have Jesus standing in the path and changing us. Christians are perfect just forgiven. 

5. So I had Friday off for my parents 44th anniversary. They went out and ate food and had fun. I watched my youngest sister. And later went to my rock thing with the church while my other sister watched my youngest sister. I had so much fun. Such a blessing. Thankful to God I have yet to miss a rock painting I do them every time even if I miss other events church might do. So fun :) Saturday I didnt do much either. Mainly a walk in the evening with my sister and a car drive to get our cat Jackie ready for our trip in just 5 weeks (from tomorrow) I'm counting down to our trip now :) 

Have a blessed week. Mine is more back to normal this time not a lot planned. But I guess that is okay too.  God bless you :) 

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, July 31st 2022)

Last one of these in July.  Wow. Where did this month go.

1. Work is harsh right now. I'm stilled fatigued from this covid and such run. Ugh. But people missed me so that was nice and that was the only nice thing. We also for now have more people so we covered some days which is good. Yes. Anyways just trying to survive while waiting for these extra fun to just go away. bye bye

2. Covid isn't fun. I have brain fog, fatigue, cough, cold. No matter how much sleep I get I am exhausted all the time. Working like this is horrible. I am also having issues doing simple things I love like painting rocks. Sadness. I am ready to be free from all this and move on with my life.

3. Church was beautiful. I missed it SO much. I never miss. 2 weeks was forever. The hugs and the love of all those who truly missed me. And love me. I'm still working on me sorry this is how it is. I am just grateful to be back at church and back with my friends that I missed and love. 

4. Tuesday went to see Thor 4. Not a bad movie. Yes a little sad. But good. After that got food and stuff and went home to chill. Made me tired. But yes it was a fun day off for sure. 

5. No therapy this week back to this next week. Fun. I do have stuff to talk about because yes. August is gonna be busy busy.  

See you all in August. Have a good week. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, July 24th 2022)

 Sorry lack of updates. This wont be long but figure I well as mind do some sort of update for the past two weeks.

1. 4th of July was fun. Sure I worked till 6. And then we had car troubles on the way down to San Clemente for our usual fun. So we barely made the fire works. But it was fun. After we gave in and went to Dennys usually we avoid it but we hungry. Came home and bed right away.

2. On the 5th we met up with my cousin, her son and later my high school friend at Knott's Soak City. It was a fun day. Got a wee bit sunburnt but all around fun time. Last time I there I hurt my knee. Yuck.

3. Worked my usual shifts even day after those 2 days exhausted. But busy. Till Sunday hit.

4. Sunday the 10th I tested positive for covid19. I had the symptoms the day before so I began my 14 day count down. Unfortunately I had spread the love on Thursday & Friday. So by Tuesday we all had it. My sister had it too she just didnt show signs for two more days. I tested negative on day 13 this last Thursday. I had skipped church twice and even missed out on our last summer book reading meeting. Ugh that disease is mean and unfair. I lost seeing my friends who only come out every few months. I didnt get to see two of them :( I also lost work although they claim they are going to pay me for it. Lets be hopeful.

5. I had my therapy appointment while sick so it wasn't much to talk about. I had my pys appointment early on the 7th not 19th and we got my medicine changed over. I also have an appointment for an endocrinologist next month. So moving right along.

Hopeful more back to normal this week. And updates per usual. Have a good week. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, July 10th 2022)

 Welcome. Busy week for me busy busy

1. Its hard to believe 11 years ago at this time I was doing my internship with Fox10 in Phoenix enjoying the time I had thinking I was FINALLY making a career move in the right direction. Sure I got sunburnt a lot. I also tried to get a job while doing that which was a failure and looking back wish I had spent more time working my internship and less time looking since none of the jobs worked out except my 3 day telemarked job which ended quickly for me in tears but I got paid and was able to pay for things like more time for my internship going on the light rail and such. I loved my internship no regrets at all!

2. Still dealt with sickness this week. But I got back to work. My medicine is mostly gone and my sinus infection appears to finally be going away. Thank God for that! On top of that I had my psychiatrist appointment on the 7th no the 19th and we are doubling my dose of medicine. Of course that comes with an issue no appointments to check back in 2 weeks. Oh no. So God has this. I dont think he is gonna let me have this and then do this to me. A full withdraw would not be good at all which is what I would get if they dont let me see her and get more medicine :( 

3. Church was so quiet on Sunday hardly anyone there. I dont know why the holiday maybe. We did cg lyrics only and messed up still so bad. Ugh. Thursday back to book club. Glad I missed it. The book is excellent and I am enjoying these thing. Too bad we only have one more week of Summer club before Fall begins.

4. Work is busy for real. Was real busy all holiday weekend. I am getting by okay. Not as stressed as I was. But more co workers leaving or soon will be. And we dont got enough as is. Not good for my mental health at all sigh

5. Monday was the 4th. We went down to San Clemente after car troubles we got super late barely saw the fireworks but they cool. After that dinner at Dennys and home late. Tuesday seemed to blend in. We met my cousin and her son at knotts soak city for like 6hrs. Later my good friend from high school met up with us too. Fun day. I was worried about slide due to my neck and shoulder so I avoided them all and my cousin and my sister rode only one while I watched her son. Otherwise we did wave pool and the river and just relax and a good time and get sunburnt lol. Food after excellent.

This week isn't as busy but its not slow either. Have a good one. God bless you as always :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, July 3rd 2022)

Welcome to July. Wow its been a busy busy week for me. How was yours?

1. Work this week has been interesting. Due to my being sick (see next number) I left early on Sunday by 3hrs (tech it was 2hrs plus my 1hr lunch yes I had time to do it). All cause I getting these dizzy spells that began on Saturday :( I did work usual other days but I didnt work on Wednesday. So I worked less days. Crazy busy job that drives me insane. Ugh

2. I am sick so I called out on Wednesday for my phone appointment. I have been getting dizzy spells, ear pain and stuffy nose lasting 2.5 weeks in total since began to get sick. I got my medicine on Friday. I am over being sick. I also did the doctor on Tuesday I am working hard to see an endocrinologist now I have my referral will take up to 3 weeks to go through. Then we wait again. Praying it continues to go smoothly. 

3. Church was beautiful but less people made me sad. Still less and less with so many gone and some not there for other reasons :( But I love my church still. Sadly no group meeting for book study due to the upcoming holiday weekend. So we have 2 more left but not this past week. Sadness I love my group and sad we couldn't meet :(

4.  Jackie turned 14 on Sunday without Rocky. Its so dang hard. I miss him. I hate this. I hate not having him. I worry about her while being sad about him and knowing I cant do anymore but then that. Love on her while mourning him :(

5. Thursday we saw the minion movie awesome. Also did another hour of cleaning. No walks this week due to my dizzy spells I miss them sadly. I also had my therapy needed appointment. All we talked about is how to handle all these people leaving church. I'm not doing so good honestly. Trying so hard to accept it and move on. Just not easy.

Well this week is SUPER busy. Have a blessed happy 4th. See you all next weekend. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, June 26th 2022)

 Welcome to the last one of these for June. Crazy huh. We are now in Summer full swing. And that is how it is going. This week is more busy for me per say but not like next week oh boy. Here we go hello July!

1. Work busy busy. I managed to not call out at all this week but boy did I want to. Yikes. Not sick. Mental sick not physical. Issues. Life ugh. Sadness all around :( But work busy. Being down without a boss and one co worker zip zero fun. Still we surviving best we can day by day by day.

2. Church is beautiful on Sunday. Guest speaker. Had fun. Missing so many that have left us. And found out one of my more special friends is leaving too. I am not doing well at all in this. I really am not. Thursday study 3 was fun again. Beautiful book. Fun time. Great fellowship. Sad we now only got 2 more to go :(

3. Beach day on Tuesday was fun. Sure we only went for like 2.5 hours and still we got sunburnt ugh. But hello longest day of the year. Believe it or not I didnt do a single walk this week and not cause I was sick either. Wow.

4. Fathers Day last Sunday was not much. I didnt work. We got food at In n Out after church. Then we watched my youngest sister while my parents went to a movie. Our least big holiday kinda mellow in a long time. Crazy but true

5. Oh Rainbow. The 23rd you would have been 20. I just wanted you to see 18! My heart is still sad. I cried a lot on Thursday. It was not fun. I hate she's not here still I hate it so much. Took a small beach visit and ice cream. She would have loved that. She loved her drives and ice cream. I love and miss you so much baby girl :(

Well have a good week. See you in July. God bless you all :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, June 19th 2022)

 Welcome. And a Happy Fathers Day to all the dads out there!! How was your week? Mine was busy as I thought and more busy then I planned. Plus wow some shockers so there you go!

1. Work was less as I called out twice. TWICE. I only had enough time to cover one of them so now I got another point & will suffer bad on my next check. Ugh. But work is busy and stressful. And yet here we are. Thank God they did approve my time off for September for our vacation. Now I just gotta keep saving 

2. Church was beautiful on Sunday kinda. In fact it was beautiful for all there. And we did CG again even though we almost didnt and were settled in. I was kinda sad to see some not there and found out on Monday & Tuesday why. Our church is losing some key members and the whole thing is breaking my heart. And I'm unsure who else might leave us for good :( I still love my church so much!! Thursday we did our second week of our book group and it was blessed as last time. Only 3 more to go maybe 4 unsure. I love this. The book is great just hard to keep reading it when there is so much but man why is this an issue. Not too many years ago I used to read for hours at a time and finish books by the handful now its hard for me to read ONE book in a less then 2 month period. Sigh. 

3. Whelp I had therapy by phone on Tuesday smack dab in the middle of my bad news and then I didnt even tell my therapist what was going on. Its SO hard for people to sometimes get WHY its affecting me like this more than them. But hey its my issues and I'm dealing Gods healing and thankful for the understanding friends even if I wont see them at church again who are there for me no matter what. We WILL find a way to see each other we have to try!! Then I had shoulder therapy. It was okay but my therapist isn't there still and pretty sure wont be anytime soon. I then learned there is a location right by my house opened in October. The only issue is they only open on Mondays & Wednesdays the days when I work for sure. I am debating still but I may just move myself over there. IF I do then I cant go back to my old place. So its a BIG decision but it would be nice to not have to travel more than 10 min from home instead of the usual 20 to 25 depending on traffic. So gonna pray about it because I should be doing that in the first place and see what happens... but glad I went my shoulder is happier so that is good and for that much its very worth it!

4. Dentist surprise I am back. This is my 4th time in 2 weeks to go for the same issue. This time my *main* dentist did the adjusting. I'm unsure in all my visits in the past 2 years how I got a main one that works on me. Its not like I picked him but somehow he is my main dentist now LOL and guess thats how it works. So he adjust 3 crowns the 2 on top and 1 on bottom. So far PTL they all feel better. If they dont in like 2 weeks come back again and make note what hurts and when. Fun for me. But hey if this is then thank you God for that. I dont want to lose any more teeth then I have already coming or lost. And that was my concern that 1 or both needed to be pulled after all we been through :( 

5. Got sick this week ICK. That was why I called out. Idk what I have but its no the dreaded C* word I did a home test tbs and its fine. I had sore throat Monday called out, I was okay Tuesday a little stuffy nose not much, Wednesday felt same but a bit worse so called out again. After we saw our planned movie both my sister and me were dying. TIRED legs major fatigue. Went home slept a bit. Then got up today. Legs still a bit tired. Nose still a bit runny. No cough. And never had a fever. No clue what we have but its not worse so I continued my plans of dentist and later study. Ugh. Over the dentist!!

Well have a good week. Mine is less busy this week which maybe that is a good thing. I need to replant some plants and just chill. Have a blessed one friends. GOD BLESS YOU!! See you for our last one in June next Sunday. :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, June 12th 2022)

Welcome Welcome. I had a super busy week! This week will be busy too. But maybe not as much. But busy can sometimes be very good. So this week I had a fun busy week :)

1. Its kinda crazy its been 11 years this week that my sister and me and the pets we had left came to visit California for a fun time. We were out a week drove here and back from AZ. We brought all the babies so Jackie, Rocky, Rainbow & Maggie. We had a fun fun time. I just look back and think how crazy it was just a few months later we were forced to move back home. Would we have even tried that trip had we known??

2. Work is busy this week but less hours. I had less hours both Sunday & Wednesday. But my hours are picking up slowly. Next week and the following. By the following as we closer to July I hope to be more normal 39 to 40 hours again oh please. While I work here I need the hours to be as much as possible. I'm saving for a thing with my cousin next month, dental in August & vacation in September!

3. Gym didnt again. But we will TRY so hard to do it on Monday. I had a bad day really bad actually so it didnt happen. I did my walks this week Wednesday & Thursdays per normal. And Tuesday was special as my very dear friend and me went on a walk first time in almost a year! It was so nice. Its hard to talk to her only once a week about serious stuff at church. I felt so much better getting so much time to just talk. Sure it wasn't the beach but it wasn't bad either we had time and it was great. I loved it. So grateful she made the time to hang out with me :) 

4. Church was beautiful Sunday. We did the graphics doing them again next week gulp. I messed up somewhat oops. I hope I'm better next time. But I love the hugs and such after. And then Thursday was our first book meeting for the Summer. Its crazy just been 3 years since I was forced into the book club and to being more in at church. It changed my life! Slowly I went more and more got to know more and more. And for sure began to hug talk to and really become part of a church I had gone to for almost 2 years before I did it. Thanks to my Pastor and God using him and so many others. Blessed!! 4 more meetings to go I wish it was more but I'll take this. :)

5. Dentist is done again. First I'm dealing with a uti again :( Did that. Later did my dental got my 2 crowns adjusted and now I feel better. I just need to be good keep up wearing my night guard and keep going. Praying I don't need anymore work again till my cleaning in August. I'm trying to be hopeful.

Have a good week. Mine is busy again. I love it! God bless you all :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, June 5th 2022)

Welcome to June! Hello month of Summer! Time is flying. We are nearly half way through 2022 that is some crazy crap.

1. Work busy but not as much as it could be as I called out one day. Oopsie. I still haven't even attempted to look for another job. It just seems so easy to complain stress and live then look for another job. Even as we lose more people and things become more stressful. That is how work is! Ugh.

2. Gym nope. I hope for next time. We shall try. However I did two walks this week on Wednesday & Thursday. Fun stuff! I am trying for a walk a day if possible as they really do help me be happy. They help my mental health and my spiritual health. Walks are truly good or me :)

3. Church was beautiful of course I love my church. I love talking to people and hugging and love so much love. I love how it changes me. And I know God knows I need it so much to be better. My mental healing comes every time I go to church. Yes it does :)

4. Did the peacocks on Tuesday again 3rd week in a row. Had different fun as different as the week before. Yup. Wednesday I had call out and went to the dentist same issue Thursday. All to find out I need my crowns readjusted and come back again next time. Ugh teeth issues.

5. Tuesday did my therapy again. I had an issue that came up on Monday night. And that was mostly what therapy about. I have hope as I organize my life around my sessions. As I heal. I have hope. I really do. God is healing me. Its now necessarily a slow process even if it is. Its okay. God has me. God is healing me. I will be okay in him. For real. 

Well that is all for now. Have a good week. Mine is more busy this week. I'm exciting. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, May 29th 2022)

Welcome. My week was super slow! Yup! Oh well I did it and that is all that matters...

1. Church beautiful on Sunday. I love my church so much!! Cant wait till our Pastor is back. And our book club starts in a few weeks. Even if it only 5 weeks I cant wait for 5 weeks of fellowship fun and a thing to do besides what I always do. Yes I love it so much. I love hugs and funny things and silly people. I love how much God pushes me and how in the middle I find love, acceptance and prayer. I am blessed beyond measure simply because I am with people God wanted me with. And I am so glad I can go to church each week my home. Its hard to believe we are heading to this weekend being 2 years since we were allowed to meet again. Wow time flies. I am so glad we are past the days of meeting online. It was a horrible 2.5 months for me :( 

2. Work busy this week but slower. They are cutting my hours. More each week :( Plus found out my manager is leaving in 3 weeks! What! I kinda am sad. I will miss her. She's nuts but still the longest I have had a manager was her. And our new store manager is um :/ I miss our old manager. I get all uncomfortable again and wonder again why am I not trying hard to leave. Didnt I just you know say I would leave. God wants me to try and I am the one choosing to suffer day after day there while they abuse us. We all laugh who work there but is it really funny? Yeah I dont think so... So yeah only 37 hours this week. Next week and following are worse. I am getting so little its almost how it would be if I dropped to 4 days a week at 8hrs a day which is 32. In two weeks I have 34 hours :(

3. Workouts this week not really. We really need to get back to the gym. Every week we get so close and then decide not to at the last moment. Ugh. Why. So yeah about that. But I have done lots of walks this week. My usual 2 on Tuesday & Thursday. Plus ones on Wednesday & Friday. I almost did one Saturday but decided not to. They are good for my health and my mental health. I should walk longer then I do. But for now I love my little walks. I'll do them in any weather but rain LOL.

4. Tuesday we went to see the Peacocks again. Yes we did! First I dyed my hair I only do it every 8 weeks so this was the day. After we saw some fun times there. I love going. I really do love going thats no joke. It gives me excitement. :) Hope to go back again next week shall see

5. This week no therapy but next week yup. I am working on me. Its the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. And I've gone to college got a degree, had one surgery, several injuries, and deal with a crap load of daily pain. Yet the scariest thing for me to work on is ME! I am scared at times what I will find out. My childhood was full of trauma. And I'm pretty sure I hid some memories somewhere because I cant recall all the things my sister can. She reminds me of stuff and then I say I dont recall that and now knowing how fragile I am she says maybe she wont remind me of it. I know no parent is perfect but I was put through a lot of crap and it turned me into who I am now. I haven't blamed God I never want to. I know God was there with me in every moment and allowed it happen. On Wednesday night I had a cry prayer session I dont do these often. But its always me praying and crying same time so hard I cant see. I dont know what I am saying it just comes out. I lay myself bare on the feet of my God knowing He can and does care about me. And knowing it will be okay. I just feel so broken. I feel so messed up. I feel like acknowledging all this isn't making me happy at all. Yet I know I am healing. I have plenty of signs I am healing and with that. By the grace of God I am better each day. I just cant give up I want to so much but I cant I have to keep going. I have to keep trying. I have to figure things out. Keep finding stuff I'm proud of, let people compliment me and let it sink in not bounce of me, learn to love myself and heck learn to forgive myself. God has got this in control 1000%

Well there you go. Have a good week everyone. A blessed one. God bless you all. See you next week. Good bye May hello June! Happy Memorial Day weekend too :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, May 22nd 2022)

Welcome on time this time. I had a busy busy week yikes a bee! How was yours?

1. Church was beautiful. I love my church time it was so fun. Hugs and love and such. Fun times. I already miss our small groups. But the thing is Summer is coming in a few weeks we will be reading a book and having fun a different kind. Yahoo!

2. Work is busy busy. Yes it is. But I only worked 4 of my days this week as I called out for a baby shower I should have gotten off. Oh well. I need a new job. They are now forcing us to have cut hours it begins this week and worse each week. This week I'm at 37. Next week its 35 the following 34. If I work 32 I well as mind work 4 days a week and get rid of my very stressful Wednesday :( NEED A NEW JOB!

3. Gym nope again. Maybe next time. I went on walks on Tuesday & Wednesday but that it. I planned a walk Thursday & Saturday didnt happen. Oh well. 

4. I had therapy on Tuesday which was very interesting. I talk to her again in 2 weeks. Then I talked to my psychiatrist on Thursday. I dont talk to her for two months. My medicine is the same. So yeah busy week for both of those in one week. 

5. Tuesday me and my mom returned to the peacock place. Fun times. Yes it was. Thursday I had zero plans to leave the house but decided to go hang out with two of my friends from my group study. We went to dinner at Hello Bettys. And then had dessert at the pie shop from the top gun house. Fun night. Glad I went but boy was it cold there. Brrr. Saturday I called out for a baby shower. My first shower since last December I've missed two before this. It was a lot of fun. Different kind of fun but fun none the less. I'm glad I went. :) 

Well that was my busy week. This week is nothing at all but oh well. Have a good one. See you next weekend. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday May 8th & Sunday May 15th 2022)

Two in one again. It just seemed easier then doing one. Thing is I should have been able last week to do this on time for just that week. BUT I got busy and lazy and stuff so here we are...two weeks worth in 1

1. Church is beautiful as always. I love my church. I love the people. I always miss when some not there. I miss them a lot :( so I am glad so many there both weeks. The 8th was Mothers Day simply wonderful I didnt work later. Church beautiful then after we did Rubys at the CB outlet. So good! Then spent rest of day chilling at home not doing much at all. My group met on the 5th but only 2 others came and me. And we met our LAST TIME on the 12th so sad :( Now we say good bye till Fall. We have Summer group coming up but not the same thing. I never thought I'd love all these ladies now I know I do very sure. 

2. The 1st & 2nd marked 12 years since the Nashville Flood. I will never forget that weekend. It came up the week before we visited California for a week. Yikes. So much damage so much changed I love my state. I still love my TN

3. Workouts we didnt do the gym at all for the past two weeks :( yikes! I did walks last week Tuesday & Thursday. But this week ONLY on Thursday. Oh well. All good. Hope we get back to the gym next week...

4. Work is busy busy but not so much too. Last week I didnt work on Mothers Day and also on the Wednesday after my dentist I called out used some PPTO. I worked normal week before my first 40 hour week this year! So my check was nice. I wish they'd give me 40 hrs each week :( Work is work till I get a new job...

5. Dentist on Tuesday the 10th not fun. The 10th marks 16 years since my grandma died still miss her forever will. I went and got my crown removed and replaced all at once. Took almost 3hrs. Ugh. Pain. That is why I called out Wednesday. But glad it done and over with and now its healing for real.

See you all next weekend. This week is busy busy. With two phone appointments and a baby shower its sure to be a fun to write about. See you all then. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, May 1st 2022)

Welcome to May! Wow May! I cant believe how close we are to SUMMER!!! Crazy. How was your week. Mine was busy busy

1. Work is busy of course. And stressful. Eek. I am dealing with way too much. My latest goal is to stop dealing with way too much. And for crying out loud LOOK FOR ANOTHER JOB! I cant keep doing this. But till then my good friend co worker comes back next week :) That is something to look forward to. And I have mothers day off so next Sunday no work for me woohoo!

2. We skipped the gym this week :( but I did two walks. My poor leg has been so bad at work that its hard even a small walk. So that wasn't fun. But I do love my walks so I will keep doing them yes I will!

3. Church was beautiful lots of hugs and love I love my church yes I do. Sadly our group didnt meet on Thursday due to someone not feeling great. So only 2 more meeting left I am gonna miss our group so much :( :(

4. Tuesday between it all I did rocks. Then the dentist for a cleaning. And a check up and not good news. I have a chip in my crown I got last year so now on the 10th I have to come get it fixed aka pulled out and replaced :( Ugh Ugh. After my appointment I picked up gifts for the baby shower next month I WILL be attending. And we went to the beach. I got a ton more rocks. We had dinner & dessert before heading home. Long almost fun day. Dentist not so much lol.

5. Thursday I did my latest therapy nothing for 3 weeks. It will take so long to work on me. SO LONG. But yet in patience and in process Jesus will heal me. Its not easy dealing with the trauma of my past but it will get better it has to. I just need to keep going. God has got me in the palm of His hands. 

Well have a good week. This week isn't busy much for me at all. Oh well. Have a good one. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, April 24th 2022)

 Welcome. Last one of these for this month. How crazy is that. So long April I am gonna miss you!!

1. Work this week busy per usual. We lost another co worker so our team up front continues to shrink and that stresses us out. I need to get a new job. I know I say this a lot but maybe if I keep saying it I will realize it and work harder to leave. I have no plans to keep working there. God willing I will be out before I hit 4 years in December!

2. Gym did it once was nice. But harsh my body isn't happy ugh. But yes. I also did two walks this week Tuesday & Thursday. Tuesday was gonna go hang out with our cousin and again that didnt work out :( So we did a movie at night and did stuff during the day. I love my walks and wish I had energy and time to do them daily!

3. Church beautiful on Sunday. I love my church. I love hugs and love. Thursday was super fun. We had a surprise baby shower planned for my friend (and my driver that takes me) at our study. Such a great time and fun surprise I am so glad she is so happy :)

4. Easter was wonderful this week! I didnt work! I asked for it off and got it. Yes I did thank you God!! So after church which I spent a lot of time at talking to others. I went with the family to Dana Point. Unfortunately it was kinda crowded and very windy and cold so we didnt sit at a table. We ate in our cars. Looked at some stuff and then left. Wasn't a lot but at least I wasn't at work. Did I say how happy I was.

5. This week mental health not doing so great. Been a bad week for me. Im trying to write it down and keep it tracked. I also missed my shoulder appointment not even my fault and I am not happy at all :( Next week is busy busy. I have my dental on Tuesday & my next therapist on Thursday. Yup.

Have a blessed week and rest of the month. See you all in May. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday April 10th & April 17th 2022)

 Hello! Welcome! I decided to combine two weeks instead of doing one so late it was almost the following week. Sorry :( 

1. Work been busy past two weeks. I worked my usual hours and that is what I worked. Busy. Short handed. Stressful. Ugh. Work is work. We losing people we not gaining them and I keep wondering WHY am I still here and WHY I am not looking for work. UGH

2. Palm Sunday was beautiful at church. Love the reminder of celebrating Jesus on the donkey. I love my church. We did our group study on the 7th and it was wonderful. But we did not have any this past week on the 14th cause of the Holy Week we took a week off. Yup.

3. Did not do the gym because my sister was back from her trip and tired on the 4th. I did do my two walks last week :) Thursday was SO HOT! We returned to the gym after almost 2 months on the 11th. It was a tiring but good back to it time. I went on only one walk this week on Tuesday. I did manage to put up all my door hangers from church took me 3 tries but I done! Yes! PTL now praying many come to church I shared with by hanging them :) 

4. We managed to do the zoo on Thursday the 14th. It was a fun time. We had breakfast out. Then we went to the zoo for a few hours. Then we went to dinner and a movie. Fun long day off from not doing study yes I needed it :)

5. The 10th marked 13 years since our Good Friday tornado in TN. I will never forget that day and how it almost hit us and for sure changed us. Wow its been that long crazy!!

Have a blessed good week. And Happy Easter. See you all next week :) God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, April 3rd 2022)

Welcome to April! I love April its my favorite month of the year cause its an even number month #4 and its in Spring my favorite season :) Fun fact: my youngest sister has the middle name of April. 

1. Church welcome back I loved you all and missed you so much. I love my church. I love the hugs and the love and support I get for me. And all I am going through. And love meeting with my small group on Thursdays always such a blessing to meet with all these young ladies :)

2. Workouts. Did 2 walks this week but no gym. My sister is out of town so no gym but hope back next week. I love me walks. I also love putting up flyers for church so people can come join us for Easter. Come join us!!

3. Work is busy. But less this week again. I didnt work on Sunday but I did work rest of the week. We short handed. And this and my anxiety zero fun. Thank God my medicine works and I am okay now but I need to figure out how to deal so maybe just maybe one day I wont need a medicine to calm me down. God can do this!

4. Saw the peacocks for the first time since last year on Tuesday. Had a fun time. Most of it happened in the neighborhood not at the actual park they at. Cause that was where the action was. Funny fun times. I love these crazy birds. :)

5. The 29th marked 4 years since Babies R Us closed for good. Man I miss my store too. My fellow co workers all we had. I know I cant get it back but it still makes me sad they gone. I miss the company too and I wish they wouldn't have had to close even if I had never worked there. It made it twice as sad cause I did work there so yeah about that boo :(

See you next week. This week not super busy either but he we get by. Have a blessed week. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, March 27th 2022)

Welcome. Doing this on time but not posting it on time. OH WELL! It was that kinda week. Last one in March. Wow. 

1. The Hot Chocolate race was so awesome on the 20th!!!!! The only thing I didnt like was they didnt have the plastic mugs they had 3 years ago. I've missed this race so much. Shocking maybe not so much but still is that not as many did the race! We usually are at the back in either H or G. This time? E! Wow! But other then that it was a nice day. The rain went away thankfully. We made the train on time. After we done (yes I missed you church sadness!) we were gonna go to the zoo. Instead we made our way to Little Italy. We walked around had breakfast well brunch maybe as we had breakfast before the race. Went to a few random stores bought some random stuff. Sadly still in our race clothes no changing till we out of the area. So after a few hours (and my sister said she felt like she lived there LOL) we headed out. Went by store on the way home and I got some Jamba Juice cause I wanted it. Back home to chill and enjoy rest of my Sunday of freedom.

2. Our little group met on Thursday which made me extra happy we meeting last week and this week too. Cause I didnt do church this was my church. I love the hugs and all that. Yes I love my little group :)

3. Workouts just did one. Not counting the race. But it was a nice workout. A walk and worked on rocks for my friend. I had a nice day on Thursday except some stuff. Ugh. Below

4. Work this week was not as busy thankfully. I was off on Sunday. I did work like normal Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Saturday. Work is a bit stressful though. And me getting a new job needs to happen soon as I can. SOON AS I CAN!

5. This week was full of appointments for me. So many. Tuesday I went and got my blood drawn. Then since I had to fast we had breakfast out and then met with my good good friend and helped plant her Jasmin plant. Beautiful smelling thing. Wednesday I talked to my therapist and a had a big for me break through. A hard one but a big one. Thursday I first had my psychiatrist which was good cause now I have more anxiety medicine. Then I went for my eye appointment only to find out they suddenly dont take my insurance anymore :(  so I had most of my appointment no cost as they didnt take it and then I left. So yes lots this week busy busy.

This week is slower and not as much. Yup. Have a good one. See you in April. God bless you :) 

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, March 20th 2022)

Welcome. This week did not go as planned. That is a good way to put it ugh

1. Work nope. I didnt work much at all. When I did work I felt like crap. I worked on Sunday & again on Friday. I had Saturday off for the hot chocolate race (more next week). I got sick probably food poisoning on Monday & Tuesday and stayed off also on Wednesday. So I am down on my PPTO and now have 4pts. Yikes. Till April 29th next 1 drops. I need to keep working on leaving I cant be here forever I might lose my mind!

2. Thursday I went for my psychical finally. And then found out that I have to do a bloodwork where I fast :( so yeah about that. So I go back this week for that fun. Not really. This week is super busy. Shorter but busy ugh.

3. Workouts not much. I did a walk just on Thursday. Due to being sick I not only lost work, I lost our last gym for several weeks. The race day after we not gonna. And the following week my sister wont be home. So oh well guess not for a few gym oh well...

4. Church beautiful on Sunday. I gave my friend my 20 rocks for the next two weeks she good! And I was super happy to go on Thursday too to the study. I love my group of friends we are so awesome and talk for hours. Its just a great time. :)

5. My mental health is just not doing so great. I feel like a massive lonely failure. I'm getting dips and days where I cry and cry. Some have a reason some do not. My racing thoughts woke me up twice this week. Back to overthinking and not sleeping and insomnia. This week I talk to both my doctors. And I hope I have some good visits. Cause I need some good news.

Have a good week. Next week is gonna be busy busy. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, March 13th 2022)

Welcome. How are you doing how was your week

1. Work busy per usual. I did call out last Sunday I wasn't sick but I didnt feel good. Ick. So I only worked 4 days this week. Yes work busy. We lost another co worker she didnt make it 3 months :( they playing switch a roo and guess what we still down a person. Life isn't fun. I just need to you know survive it till I get out of my job too. Carefully.

2. Workouts just did walks this week. We skipped gym again. Maybe not such a good idea being we so close to the race. But that is what we did. Oh well. We are almost to race day yes we are.

3. Church was beautiful I love my church. Gave my friend rocks. Hugs for my friend going back home. So much love. And Thursday thank God we got to go. I was so happy. We had a great time there too. Yes. Love going to our group studys. :)

4. Tuesday I went out to dinner with a friend from our group. Was a fun night. I love hanging out with people and friends that I love. Great night! 

5. Me and my issues continue to be a mystery. I had a dip this week again. Not as bad as last time but still a dip. I also admitted something about what I am going through to my co worker. This is co worker number 2. Idk how I keep admitting it. Maybe the stigma will go away with me piece by piece as I tell more people about what I have been going through. All while trying to get better in God and all I am doing. I am not gonna give up on ME not one bit.

Busy week ahead here. Just a few more days this week and by this time next weekend we will be done with our race. Yes!! Hard to believe its been 2 years since all our normal went away due to c*. Have a good one. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, March 6th 2022)

Welcome to March! Hello! I feel weird I'm writing this on a Saturday and I'm not at work. More below. :) Happy Saturday and Sunday everyone!!

1. Church was beautiful on Sunday. I gave my friend rocks and 2 days later she down to 2 of 10. So I am working on more. I love my friends and hugs and love. Sunday is my FAVORITE day of the week. I love everyone so much :)

2. Work busy this week but less days hurray. I only worked 4 days. I had Saturday off for (see below). Busy and stuff. I'm grateful for breathers like more people and things covered like breaks and lunches. But when there is too many of us it still feels stressful its the weirdest thing EVER. LOL. Oh well. 

3. Tuesday was a great day. I went on a walk with my dear friend from church. I love her so much! We walked by the water this time unlike last time I didnt have to work after. Went in the afternoon low Tide we walked all the way to the pier and beyond and back. I was sure tired. But it was so fun. Blessed refreshing walk with my friend. We cant seem to help doing walks now each time she out visiting. I pray she's here for good soon like she wants to be!

4. Saturday was the memorial for my friend her husband went to heaven in January. I missed her so much. I made sure she got two hugs of love from me. And I gave her a rock I made especially for her. I hope when she finally opens it she loves it. :) 

5. Therapy on Wednesday was okay. I am fooling myself and my therapist. I made myself think I am OKAY with therapy once a month I AM NOT! On Sunday I had my first dip in over a month. I couldn't stop crying and having panic attacks. Then on Thursday I had a HUGE let down that made me cry off and on for hours. I never do this. Twice in one week like this isn't great. So Monday I'm gonna see if I can talk to my therapist sooner then next month. I think I need to go back to once every two or three weeks not once a month. With the medicine it doesn't mean I am fully okay. The medicine is only helping tame my emotional best. Its still there hidden. I have tons of issues TONS OF ISSUES to deal with. I am not doing good still. So yeah about that...ugh mental health is exhausting trying to get it better its so hard when I waited so long. I should have tried this years ago not just last year and being my age :(

Well have a good week. Mine is more normal this time around. Less fun. But I have some plans. God bless you always :) 

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, February 27th 2022)

Welcome. Last one of these for this month crazy we are heading this week into March. And 2022 is Marching on and on... this was an unexpected in some ways week oh well

1. Work busy busy. Glad to be done with last weekend it exhausted me and left me so tired so I finally caught up on sleep later in the week. So yes busy work. But so glad to have a new person I am so happy about this. It helps us breath a bit more :) yes

2. Gym nope. But I did just one walk this week. One. It rained and was super cold on Tuesday so only went on Thursday. We are less than a month from our race. Maybe I should start to do longer walks. I really should. Maybe next week I will try a LONGER walk. Shall see. Trying 

3. Church was beautiful. Hugs and love so much. Sadly we canceled our group on Thursday for reasons. So only had church. Hope we all back by next week for a good time. I love my group. And I love my church :)

4. I am done working on more rocks. I added a few more. So I had a fun week filling up my rocks for my friend. I cant wait to give them to her on Sunday. Yes!! I love doing these for God no credit for me :)

5. Tuesday I had my psychiatrist appointment. Staying with my current medicine. And not adding one for anxiety. Okay then. Thursday my doctor is giving me something for my issue I went in for few weeks ago even if I for sure dont have it. And I have to see if I still have my uni so next week yuck.

Well see you in March. Have a good week. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, February 20th 2022)

Welcome. Hard to believe exactly one month from today is the Hot Chocolate 5K race! We haven't done it in person since 2019. So much has changed since I last did it. For example I didnt talk to anyone at church and now I talk to so many. I wonder how many will miss me that day since its on a Sunday? I think a lot. I rarely miss church. RARELY MISS CHURCH! I haven't missed a single service in person for several years going back to 2020 possibly maybe 2019. Wow. 

1. Church is beautiful. Love and hugs and many came back to church haven't seen some in a few weeks some much longer so fun. I love all my family I love them all so much. And they love me. I had valentine heart rocks I handed out all 21 :) gave my dear friend the rocks I had painted for her rock garden. And a rock I had painted for her :) I got to see my dear friend visiting from TX haven't seen her in almost 3 months!! So great love it. Our group met on Thursday blessed there too. So blessed :)

2. Went to the doctor this week to renew my diabetes medicine. Still dont know what is wrong with me from my woman visit last week. Ugh. Now going to talk to the doctor via phone or video phone next week hope for answers and medicine or something or if I gotta test more that too. I think my uti cleared up but I still have so many issues :( 

3. Work is busy. But less is more so not working on Monday the 14th was great! Busy and we still short handed. But I work and I work because there is where I am always. One day I wont be. I KNOW I will be missed. We are so short handed. But I have zero intentions of retiring at this job. I dont want to be here even till my 4th year. Lord willing I want to be gone by Summer. I gotta start looking again but I need to START first

4. Workouts. No gym due to the birthday thing Monday. We had rain on Tuesday boo so no walk. I did one walk this week just on Thursday. I love my walks what a beautiful day it was. Love them. :) 

5. Monday was valentines day and my moms birthday she turned ** year old LOL. Got a late start. We went to Sea World for like 3hrs. First we got distracted when I a hawk took a bath in my bird bath this NEVER happens! SW was fun but didnt do much. Then food at cheese cake factory to go. Came home ate and crashed. I was exhausted. I always wonder each year on Vday if next year I will have a special someone on Vday the following year...God knows and I do not!

Have a good week. Mine will be busy but not much fun :( oh well. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, February 13th 2022)

 Welcome. We are in some sorta heat spell as I write this. It should be gone by today and that is living in California LOL. How was your week? Mine wasn't as busy as I thought but it was somewhat yeah.

1. Work is busy of course. Sunday was insane busy. And so many people trying to steal. I mean my job is pretty much try to stop them while knowing that they will probably still get away. I am grateful to God my medicine is working so most days I dont have the anxiety I had ON TOP of doing my duties for my job. Ugh. I need a new job. My sister got a new job I need one too. But sadly I cant just get a job like that. I need days off during the week for my neck chiropractor and my shoulder therapy and then my other mental health stuff. I cant just work all week long. So unsure what that looks like I will begin to look soon just unsure where to start. Just start I guess...

2. Tuesday I had a women's doctor appointment for an issue been dealing with since 2014! Plus one of current. Waiting for results. And somehow in all that I got a UTI my first ever ugh sigh. On medicine now praying it helps. But knowing its not the my only issue while wondering if I will ever figure out what is wrong with me isn't fun at all just saying. Thank God my medicine went through and I'm back on my medicine refills till I talk to my psychiatrist on the 22nd :)

3. Church was beautiful on Sunday. Love and hugs. I sure do hug everyone now full on. I've gone away with half hugs most people get full hugs. I feel like I graduated or something. Who am I? Still missed a few people not there some of my favorites. Hope they come next week. Thursday got to go to my group study a blessed time I love all those ladies. Always a fun one :)

4. Workouts no gym this week my sister hurt herself and we decided best to rest and will try again in two weeks. Next Monday is moms birthday so I wont be at work or doing anything I usually do.... I did two walks this week both alone and my usual. None too far and none with friends. Maybe next week fingers crossed.

5. Been painting rocks for my friend and I love doing this. I love doing it so much. Its a good thing to do. I want to do some replanting of my succulents and cleaning up our patio. But the heat and lack of sleep got to me. So nope. Maybe next week I will try again heres to hoping!!

Have a good week. Mine will be super busy but at least I am working one less day yup. Have a good one. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, February 6th 2022)

Welcome to February and hello first weekend of the month. Where did last month go? Crazy stuff!

1. Its been 5 years since I was told with my co workers that Babies R Us was closing. We found out the end of January 2018 and we were gone by end of March 2018. I cant believe its been 5 years. What a heart breaking day. I spent 9 months not working in 2018 before I ended up at my current job. I miss all we had. I loved my job so much and my people. I wonder if I would still be there had we not closed... I wonder would we have survived the pandemic...

2. Work was busy and is busy. It continues to be busy. But good news is I didnt work all my days cause I got Friday off for Jury Duty which I did not have to do. So I just had the day off. So work busy but glad my co worker is back and yes one less day in my 4 in a row.

3. Didnt do the gym again not my idea but went with it. I did manage 3 different workout walks this week. Tuesday, Thursday and Friday. Sadly Tuesday I didnt get to do a walk with my friend :( so I just did a LONG walk instead to our Starbucks and my mom picked me up. But I was gonna come back too. I then dyed my hair. Friday I did a surprise 3rd when I couldn't sleep much so I used that time for another walk. Which was NICE! 

4. Church beautiful as always. My hugs and my friends. I am so glad to go to church. And Thursday got to go back with the study we had our food night. It was wonderful lots of good food and good chats. Had so much fun. I love my little group :)

5. Friday instead of working and no jury duty I went with my two friends from church. It was a fun time. We had lunch and chatted. Got to know each other better. A piece of me gets confused who knows what at church so I am still working on telling everyone my story and the more people I know the more I tell the more I forget who knows what. But I love my church people so much. 

Have a good week. Mine will be a bit busy. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, January 30th 2022)

Last one of these for this month and wow we done with the first month of the new year crazy. Sorry this is late :( 

1. Church was blessing. I love my church. Had fun. Lots of hugs and love. Sadly I didnt make the small group for the week that made me sad. But still love my church.

2. Work same old busy. I haven't called out so that is good. But I do work and work is busy. That is how it goes. Same old crazy zoo I work at. Why am I there still

3. Workouts just did my two walks this week. We skipped the gym sadly. So no gym. But had fun doing walks for sure. 

4. Tuesday I canceled my chiropractor. I have some personal issues that have returned and making me uncomfortable. So I canceled and we did get more rocks for painting. I had fun painting rocks later on too. Yeah we dealing.

5. Thursday had my therapy for my shoulder. The thing is I am unsure when I will be going back. My therapist isn't here on the days I go in so I am unsure when I will be coming back and that makes me sad. That and no group that night. I didnt like Thursday one bit :(

Well good bye January see you in February. Have a good week. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, January 23rd 2022)

Welcome. Sorry this is just one day late. I got busy and life got to me. Sorry!! But I'm posting it and its up now so there you go...one more of these for the month crazy stuff.

1. Church beautiful of course. I love my church. I love the hugs and the love and the prayers and all that. My GOOD friend came back from her temporary state again. I haven't seen her since last month. We hugged forever. And then talked so much after. I love her so much. Thursday group was great. So great we went late like very late. Oops. But we had a good time. Yes love my group too!!

2. Workouts didn't do the gym but that okay. I did my walks the week twice. Tuesday before my shoulder therapy and Thursday when I got up for the day. I love my walks day or night beautiful. 

3. Wednesday my GOOD friend spoke about above and me hung out for the first time ever outside of church. It was a lot of fun. I love her even more outside of church. We walked and had coffee and talked and talked. And then at work later that day I had ZERO anxiety. And she had a good day too. We so good for each other and God is so good to bring us together :)

4. Work busy busy. I didnt call out but boy did I want to. Ugh. So yeah worked all my hours. They changing me up and putting me back to working as late as I can on Saturdays begins next week ugh. I had less stress Wednesday in part cause they got me my co worker now a night person. So happy!!

5. Therapy is good for my shoulder. Sadly my personal issue like last years came back began slowly and by day 3 which was Friday I dying. Bad pain on Saturday too just not like Friday as much. Ugh. Why. Also talked to my therapist my first session with her since December. Holidays and such. I caught her up and then cried my eyes out after. My good friend from high school made me feel better to say that it can take a day or two to recover from therapy and that its normal and not a set back. So I am like okay...good. My medicine is working most days. I think its balancing me out. If it takes my crying all the time and as much anxiety as possible its great. I can then think straight to work on therapy and getting tested for ADHD and whatever else I might have wrong. I think facing these minor things more important then getting tested for all. And in time I will be tested for other things too. God has got me it will be okay

Have a great week. Mine shall be busy. Till next weekend. God bless :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, January 16th 2022)

Welcome. Weird this is our third Sunday in the month so we are actually like half way through the month. Crazy is that? We been having weird weather here too. Really hot on Tuesday like Summer. And then rain and such on Saturday. What...

1. Church beautiful as always. I love my friends and hugs and prayers. I love seeing people I dont always see and some I do. I love it all. I also love our small group on Thursdays. As much as I weekly miss meeting with everyone I love the group of ladies God put me in with. Like learning this week that we ALL are very scared easily and some of us me included hate the dark. Wow.

2. Gym did it once just on Monday. But worked out more than the week before so that was good. Our race is coming up pretty fast. Also did walks on both Tuesday & Thursday. Yup. I love my walks. 

3. Work busy busy. I managed to work every day of my week of 40hrs back to 39 next week. I worked them all baby. And it wasn't fun but I did it barely but still I did it. 

4. Tuesday we didnt go hang out with our cousin and her son. Sadly. But we made the best of it. We went to a movie. Then dinner at Rubys which I wanted to do that for my birthday but couldn't make it. Also I got myself some new work shoes to help my poor achy feet. So nice day.

5. Thursday was so busy for me. Yikes. I had my psychiatrist appointment and to my shock she changed my dose for my medicine instead of replacing it. So thats what I am doing the next 4 weeks. Then my therapist got weirded out I had an appointment already with my other doctor so she rescheduled now I got to work around my job next Friday instead. Then I did my shoulder therapy. Which was what it was. But so busy. 

Have a good week. Mine is busy per usual but nothing too exciting. Have a blessed one. God bless you :)

The Weekend 5 (Sunday, January 9th 2022)

Welcome. What a beautiful week it has been weather wise. Just gorgeous not gonna like I hate the rain. Yes we need it but boy is it zero fun. So I'm glad for NO rain this week at all :)

1. Work busy yes. I called out on Wednesday cause I had a personal not feel good not a sick one. So yeah. I didnt work my full 5. I'm gonna feel the extra time off but it shouldn't be as bad as my last check yeah I felt that... waiting for them to approve my time off for the race in March. Signed up this week so we dont have to pay as much. I'm excited about the race!!

2. Church love it. Was sad several key people not there this Sunday made me sad :( but I got to see my dear friend who hasn't been here in almost 2 months due to personal reasons. So that made me happy :) small groups back this week. Had to meet at a different house for reasons. But it all good. I love small groups. Welcome back!

3. Did the gym sorta on Monday first time since November. We had birthdays holidays and us both being sick for several that kept us away all last month. Yuck. Also managed two walks this week both during the day. I love evening walks buts morning or afternoon are super great too. Different animals different everything. Love me walks :)

4. Did my shoulder therapy again on Tuesday after a break last week. And my insurance is cheaper now so only paid $5 not $15. Still cant come more than once a week but I will be coming back every week once a week too. Haven't decided yet on my neck injury but did finally call my adjuster. So hope she gets back to me soon about that.

5. Saw my psychiatrist on Wednesday. Its been almost 5 weeks of using Prozac. She is worried my dips I have been having are a sign the medicine is giving me bad side affects. Idk for sure only God does. So I'm praying for His will in this. I am no double my dose for a week to see if I get worse or get better. If I get better and feel great then she will put me on 20m not 10m. If I dont improve or get worse she will switch my medicines. I just want to feel better. I knew this might happen. I am so happy the days it does work and I feel nothing bad. But those dips aren't to be messed with. I finally told my sister what I am on she's the first family member I told in my direct family. Unsure if I will ever tell my parents. I dont know if they would get why I'm doing it or anything. But my sister knows as she has a while ago dealt with her own issues...

This week is so busy for me. Have a good one. God bless you always :)